IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it causes serious pollution and uses up the worlds fuel resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #air #travel #pollution #worlds #fuel #resources
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Transportation by
air
Use synonyms
 is known to be the fastest means of conveying
large number
Suggestion
a large number
 of people and items across the seas and to very far destinations. It is a debated issue as whether to restrict
air
Use synonyms
travel
Use synonyms
 due to serious pollution which it causes. But
i
refers to the speaker or writer
I
 disagree
to
Suggestion
with
 the idea of restricting
air
Use synonyms
travel
Use synonyms
 as
this
Linking Words
 will cause some problem and
also
Linking Words
 solve some problems too.
Air
Use synonyms
travel
Use synonyms
 has helped to make the world a global village.
For instance
Linking Words
, people
travel
Use synonyms
 to various places within a space of time to visit friends and loved ones.
Linking Words
However if
Accept comma addition
However, if
this
Linking Words
 means of
traveling gets
Suggestion
travelling, getting
travelling gets
travelling getting
traveling getting
 restricted, people will find it difficult to explore the world.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, other means of transportation
such
Linking Words
 as cars and
ships etc
Accept comma addition
ships, etc.
ships etc.
 are
also
Linking Words
 known to cause
air
Use synonyms
 pollution and makes use of the
worlds
Suggestion
world's
 fuel resources which
also
Linking Words
 poses a threat to the climate. Global
warming which
Accept comma addition
warming, which
 is the main issue can
also
Linking Words
 be checked by limiting the number of cars used by people and encouraging people to use public transport
instead
Linking Words
. Restricting
air
Use synonyms
travel
Use synonyms
 will equally reduce tourism, intercultural exchange, etc. Countries like Ethopia who rely
soley
without any others being included or involved
solely
 on
air
Use synonyms
 flight as a major source of income will definitely
loose
fail to keep or to maintain; cease to have, either physically or in an abstract sense
lose
 if these
idea
Suggestion
ideas
 of restriction
thrives
Suggestion
thrive
. In conclusion, It is irrefutable that
air
Use synonyms
 planes consumes fuel and causes
pollution but
Accept comma addition
pollution, but
 it would be unpractical to stop
air
Use synonyms
travel
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 due to
this
Linking Words
 reason.
This
Linking Words
 will cost so many nations
alot
give out
allot
afloat
 economically and will equally
inconvinence
an inconvenient discomfort
inconvenienced
inconvenient
inconvenience
 individuals. Technology should be encouraged to produce
air
Use synonyms
 planes with less energy consuming engines.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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