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Writing Samples
Band 6

It is common practice for some students to take a gap year between high school and university in order to do charitable work abroad in under developed countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages for young people of doing volunteer work?

#practice #students #gap #year #school #university #work #countries #people #volunteer
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Some students opt for a gap year between a high school and tertiary education so that to do charitable
work
Use synonyms
 abroad in less fortunate nations.
This
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 essay will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of
this
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 trend. There are some
advantageous
Suggestion
advantages
 of doing charitable
work
Use synonyms
. One positive aspect is that, it brings a sense of empathy for people in teenagers. Youngsters involving themselves in some kind of charitable activity by taking a break in their studies, instill in them the sense of responsibility they have for the betterment of people who are underprivileged. Taking initiatives for doing something useful for a person can in turn developed a sympathy for others. A recent study by Oxford University,
for instance
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, suggested that younger people who opt for any kind of charitable
work
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, are more sensitive regarding other people of the society who are less fortunate. Another good point is that, doing charitable
work
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 apart from studies
ca
Suggestion
CA
can
build
Suggestion
builds
 the practical experience and skills-set in students. Charitable
work
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such
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 as teaching to the people in the less developed area, and performing duty as a medical trainer, consist of opting to practical
work
Use synonyms
, which in turn is beneficial for fostering practical knowledge in students.
This
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 trend has some negative outcomes on teenagers.
Firstly
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, investing time in charitable
work
Use synonyms
 can compromise the studies of the younger people. Practical
work
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such
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 as the charitable
work
Use synonyms
 required a person to abandon its school or university going for a specific time period, which can have detrimental effects on studies, as not taking classes or lectures for long can divert the attention of students
form
a giver or sender
from
 education. Research by National College of Indonesia,
for example
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, reported that teenagers who opt for a practical
work
Use synonyms
 not directly related to their studies, for more than a month, by leaving studies can significantly
diminishes
Suggestion
diminish
 their interest in studies.
Secondly
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, teenagers are highly prone to the inexperienced environment of another country. Students travelling to
other
any of various alternatives; some other
another
 country for the purpose of charitable
work
Use synonyms
 may be affected by the bad people and their surroundings.
This
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 is because they are not aware of the circumstances and people, and they may be easily indulged in some bad activities by local bad people. In conclusion, taking a gap year between a high school and university education has advantages
such
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 as building a sense of doing something for others and developing practical experience, and
also
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 drawbacks mainly abandoning studies and vulnerability of teenagers in abroad country to the bad people.
Submitted by rehans.khan1992 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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