Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults. What do you think is the reason for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

#forms #leisure #activity #countries #adults #reason #development

In a recent survey conducted by times magazine states that shopping is the most famous pass time for youngsters. In my opinion, shopping is the

convienient

suited to your comfort or purpose or needs

convenient

convenience

and

intersting

arousing or holding the attention

interesting

leisure activity

that is

why more youngsters are attracted to it. If the shopping is

controled

restrained or managed or kept within certain bounds

controlled

with in

internal to, not outside; located in the bounds of

within

the

budget

Accept comma addition

budget, then

then

it is a positive development. There are numerous reasons why

yougsters

a young person of either sex

youngsters

prefer shopping

Suggestion

their favourite famous pass time.

Firstly

, buying things from retail shops or online is

intersting

arousing or holding the attention

interesting

and trendy

Accept space

In other words

, by shopping latest fashion people feels good and happy.

Secondly

, shopping acts as a stress buster in today's busy

life style

a manner of living that reflects the person's values and attitudes

lifestyle

For instance

Accept space

frieds

a person you know well and regard with affection and trust

friends

can plan

shopping

Suggestion

to shop

on weekends that eventually will increase their bonding and it acts as

stress buster

Suggestion

a stress buster

stress busters

Accept space

Shopping is always considered as a positive trend because it has many advantages

Accept space

One of the primary

benefit

Suggestion

benefits

is that people can always be fashionable by purchasing recent fashions from the retail shops. Another point is people can save money by shopping when there is an offer going on especially from online shopping sites.

For example

, many retail shops and online portals are giving weekend offers and clearance sale which will help people to do

budjet

a sum of money allocated for a particular purpose

budget

shopping.

However

, shopping should be

with in

internal to, not outside; located in the bounds of

within

the

budject

a sum of money allocated for a particular purpose

budget

Accept space

Suggestion

i.e.

, it should be within our

budject

a sum of money allocated for a particular purpose

budget

Accept space

In conclusion, shopping is considered as the most popular leisure activity across the world and it has many remarkable benefits.

Submitted by lijiac020 on Fri Jul 12 2019

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

241 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults. What do you think is the reason for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that we do not need printed newspapers anymore. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The government should invest more money in teaching science than in other subjects for a country development and progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodmaking should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

n many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.