Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people belive that it is important for children to make decisisons about matters that affect them.

It is noted that some people are of the opinion that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (
such
as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. While other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. In my opinion, I would support the former belief. Children are mesmerized about anything they see in terms of foods, clothes or entertainment. They do not have the mind to judge between the right and wrong. It is only through the training by the world around them that they are able to differentiate. In order to better understand
this let’s
Accept comma addition
this, let’s
take an example of a child binging on chips and cold drink, which seems like a better option than vegetables. We are aware of the detrimental effects of junk food on health of not only children but
also
adults alike. Our everyday trivial choices today will help bigger decisions tomorrow. In
case
Suggestion
the case
of clothing and entertainment they are factors, which we indulge in while we view the world. If brought up in a top-notch family our dressing style would be a lot different from a poor household. In certain situations we are expected to follow norms and
hence
individual will make decisions for the betterment of himself or herself.
In contrast
, in matters of religion today parents let their children make their
choice unlike
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choice, unlike
days
Suggestion
the days
of the past. Religion forms an identity of an
individual
Suggestion
individual, although it
although
it isn’t forced upon anymore. In
this
case, it would be important for children to have a say. To conclude, I feel that our choices shape
us but
Accept comma addition
us, but
it is important that we are shaped by the ideologies of the world.
Submitted by rufina on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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