Health and leisure Life has become much more stressful compared to our parent’s generation. As a result, stress related illnesses are increasing around the world. Why is stress such a problem in the modern world and what do you think can be done to overcome the problems caused by stress?

Nowadays, there is
colossal upsurge
Suggestion
a colossal upsurge
in the level of
stress
encountered in the contemporary life when matched with the medieval times.
This
has led to a rise in ailments associated with distress. While, there are ways to bring
this
under control, I think non contentment on the part of the younger generation as well as bad governance is the major reason for
this
.
To begin
with, the prime cause of anxiety is the lack of contentment and non functional
government
. Individuals, especially the youths
wants
Suggestion
want
to get rich overnight. They are not ready to start small the way it is done during the olden days. In fact, those termed as
averagely
rich are not contented and still engage in activities that will fetch more money.
This
get rich syndrome is evident in a research by the Lagos University Teaching Hospital to unravel the mystery behind the high rate of hypertension in youths.
Result
Suggestion
The result
shows that, young individuals engage in other personal businesses asides their paid employment in order to augment their salary.
As a result
, they rarely have time to
relax which
Accept comma addition
relax, which
has
negative effect
Suggestion
a negative effect
on their health.
Additionally
, the
government
has
also
played a role in increasing the level of nervousness in its citizens. The taxes remitted to the nation are not judiciously used. The populace lack sound sleep because of late arrival from work and rising early to work in order to boycott traffic gridlocks caused by bad roads not properly maintained by the
government
. Overall, inefficient
government
and the need to make more money is a major cause of
stress
in
younger generation
Suggestion
the younger generation
younger generations
.
This
menace can be curbed by unwinding and the provision of good road networks by the
government
. Modern generation should endeavour to relax more often to purify their
mind
Suggestion
minds
and relieve tension. A research was carried out by the World Health Organization on how to reduce
stress
related illness and
result
Suggestion
the result
shows that relaxation is Paramount to mental well being.
Furthermore
, the
government
can help reduce anxiety level.
This
can be done by ensuring the optimum use of
nation's resources
Suggestion
the nation's resources
a nation's resources
by providing basic amenities like good roads.
Consequently
, lesser hours will be spent in traffic which will help ease off
stress
Suggestion
the stress
. In all, mental repose and good road networks will subdue
stress
related complaint. In conclusion, while there are various causes of sickness associated with
stress
, regular relaxation as well as
provision
Suggestion
the provision
of better road for ease of movement will help eradicate the problem.
Submitted by Asake on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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