some people believe that traditional medicines such as herbal medicines or acupuncture are more benefit than modern medicines

#people #medicines #acupuncture #benefit

Traditional

medicine

is growing in popularity and many people are now using methods

such

as acupuncture and herbal medicines to maintain and strengthen their health. Many of those who have experienced traditional

medicine

believe that it is more effective than modern

medicine

. I completely disagree with

this points

Suggestion

this point

these points

Modern

medicine

has many advantages over traditional medicines.

Firstly

, modern

medicine

is fast and effective because drugs are designed to treat problems immediately.

On the other hand

, traditional

medicine

is slow and does not work very well. Medical research shows that headache would go away after an hour from using drugs, while it would take longer hours for patients to use herbal remedies.

In addition

, modern

medicine

is constantly being developed and improved,

such

as researching to find a cure for cancer, AIDS or other fatal diseases.

However

, traditional

medicine

only uses old knowledge and techniques to treat patients.

Furthermore

, it depends on natural ingredients like herbs and other plants that might disappear. Another important point is that modern

medicine

is strictly controlled by government to ensure high standards or quality. In Vietnam,

for instance

, becoming a doctor or pharmacist, he/she need to study at medical universities at least seven years, whereas, anyone

also

can open their own traditional

medicine

clinics. Recent media report that some herbal medicines are ineffective by causing a detrimental impact on individuals using it. To sum up, traditional

medicine

relies on natural ingredients and does not work for everyone, while modern

medicine

is fast, safe and constantly renovated.

Thus

, I believe that it is far better to maintain overall health.

Wed Aug 07 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
In many countries, the number of plants and animals are declining. why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?
There is a widely held perception in many parts of the world that biodiversity has been affected in a negative way over the last two or three decades. As a result, a decline in flora and fauna's habitat has become a serious issue to take into consideration. In this essay, I aim to identify the sources of this problem as well as some viable solutions to it.
4.5
band
There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.
An increasing number of married couples around the world choosing to remain childless. The main benefits of not having a child for couples are that they can focus on their careers and have more time for themselves. The main drawbacks are that they could not fit into their peers’ group and have no one to look after them when they get old.
7
band
In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehical will be passenger. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?
Artificial Intelligence is already dominating almost all fields around the world. Driverless vehicles would be one of the aspects of technological advancements, which we could see in the near future, and these vehicles would be responsible for carrying people who are travelling from one place to another. In my opinion, the positives of this would be more than the negatives that I will discuss in my essay.
6.5
band
Art classes, such as painting and drawing are as important to a child's development as other subjects so it should bes compulsory in high schools. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
Some people believe that art should become compulsory in schools because of its positive effects on the maturity of children. The writer of this essay holds a view that it should be optional as being suitable for gifted students.
8
band
Some people think a country benefits from a large proportion of young university students, others think sending young people to universities only lead to graduate unemployment. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
The debate over the pros and cons of many youth enrolling in tertiary institutions is complex and ongoing. Proponents believe that more highly educated would benefit the nations, while critics argue that graduates would increase unemployment. I believe widespread college access can drive innovation and economic growth, which outweighs the drawbacks.

some people believe that traditional medicines such as herbal medicines or acupuncture are more benefit than modern medicines

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries, the number of plants and animals are declining. why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehical will be passenger. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Art classes, such as painting and drawing are as important to a child's development as other subjects so it should bes compulsory in high schools. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some people think a country benefits from a large proportion of young university students, others think sending young people to universities only lead to graduate unemployment. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.