IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals, others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #time #loss #species #plants #animals
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No wonder that technological advances in transportation have made it easier for
food
Use synonyms
 commodities to travel around the globe.
However
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,
such
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 blooming
trend
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 in trading nourishments
are
Suggestion
is
 probably responsible for the drop in local
food
Use synonyms
 consumption because people tend to have more preference for the exotic one.
This
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 essay will illustrate both stands of the phenomenon before the ultimate conclusion is reached.
To begin
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 with, it is obvious that amenities to transport help
food
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 miles shorten than ever before, which benefits local consumers greatly from various
Use synonyms
food
Suggestion
foods
 and victual choices. To illustrate, people living in cold climate countries where land do not
favor
promote over another
favour
 growing all sorts of fruits and vegetables throughout the year can try tropical fruits and delicatessen from other regions.
Moreover
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, as multi-national giants coming raises higher competitiveness with local
food
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 producers, to be served on the dining table, local products must be leveled up
tasty
Suggestion
taste
, ingredients, packaging and many other qualities and lowered their prices.
Accordingly
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,
such
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 globalized
food
Use synonyms
trend
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 has resulted in people having the ability to enjoy foods
to
Suggestion
in
 that they did not previously have access at really reasonable prices.
However
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, there are some downsides to the
trend
Use synonyms
 that should be taken into consideration. As mentioned above, international
food
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 companies with their advanced manufacturing technologies and clever advertising strategies make them far more efficient than local ones.
As a result
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, the lack of
competitiveness
Suggestion
competition
 is synonymous with potential closure to local producers, vanishing local traditional products, and impairing cultural cuisine in the long run.
In addition
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, imported
food
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 is not likely to be fresh and safe
to
Suggestion
for
 our health given that preservatives and other harmful substances are commonly used in
food
Use synonyms
 processing to transport in a long distance between areas or countries. In conclusion, it is apparent that the
food
Use synonyms
 produced in other regions is gaining
popularity albeit
Accept comma addition
popularity, albeit
 several minuses concerning its fresh and local cuisine impact.
However
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, I strongly believe that
this
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 is a positive
trend
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 due to the diversified diet and domestic
food
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 quality enhancement.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • extinction
  • habitat loss
  • ecosystem
  • food chain
  • imbalance
  • interconnected
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • personal actions
  • policy changes
  • education
  • awareness
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