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Band 5

Some governments spend a lot of public money training individuals to be successful in international sporting events. Some people believe that this money should be spent on things that will benefit the general public instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#governments #money #individuals #events #people #benefit
It is considered by many people that over expenditure is done by the authorities in training and development of athletes who
represents
Suggestion
represented
 the
country
 at various international sporting events. They feel that these funds should be utilized for all citizens to benefit the society as a whole. I agree that it is important to give preference to
sports
Accept comma addition
sports, however
however
, other areas should not be ignored On the one hand allocation of funds is necessary for the polishing the skills of
sportsperson
.
Firstly
, these athletes are not normal
people but
Accept comma addition
people, but
 they are
asset
Suggestion
an asset
 to a nation. They bring pride to a
country
 when any medal is won by them and the
country
 is more respected and recognized by the entire world.
Secondly
, these
sportsperson
 gets rewards
on
Suggestion
for
 winning any title which is considered as their income. They pay back to the government in the form of Income- Tax which is utilized for the public welfare.
On the other hand
, it is not justified to spend more than required funds for sports.
This
 may lead to ignorance of other areas of development like health, education, infrastructure which play a vital role in the growth of an economy.
For instance
, if proper schools and universities are not there in ay
country
Accept comma addition
country, then
then
 their citizens may lack basic education which is important for their personal growth as well as the growth of the nation as a whole. In conclusion, I support that a
country
 can grow if all the sectors are given equal importance rather than emphasizing on any one particular area for the development
pf
connects a noun with the preceding word
of
 the nation.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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