IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

More and more people are relying on the private car as their major means of transportation. Describe some of the problems over-reliance on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution.

#people #car #transportation #over-reliance #cars
Tourists are generally drawn to museums and historical locations when visiting new countries.
However
, records
have shown
Suggestion
show
 local people’s low attendance at these attractions. Some explanations will be put forward before solutions can be drawn to tackle
this
 problem. There are several reasons as to why tourists,
instead
 of the local people, come to museums and historical places.
First
, these locations can provide visitors with a comprehensive overview of the traditions in the particular locality they are situated.
As a result
,
such
 destinations are generally more appealing to the newcomers than to the locals, those without the need to familiarise themselves with the traditional values of the region.
Moreover
, because the layout of museums and historical houses is likely to remain unchanged through years, they can be visually unattractive to the local inhabitants, who may have been to these sites for at least once in their younger years. Several measures can be prompted to promote locals’ attendance rate at buildings for historic relics and museums. The main solution is to change the public’s perception of
such
 places as sites for only monotonous activities. Should civic events including weddings, anniversaries and concerts be allowed to be held in these locations, they would attract substantial public attention to historical values. Another resolution is that historians and preservationists should be featured more frequently on the media, with their articles on the tremendous worth of museums and historical remains. To conclude, historical areas and museums can be uninteresting for local citizens because they can be too familiar with the culture that these places depict. To better
this
, there should be more media coverage on historical assets, and
also
 more open-door policies to use
such
 locations as spots for more public-oriented activities.
Submitted by kuvejoj on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: