Parents should spend more time with their children helping them with their homework. Do you agree or disagree?

Parents
are in a crucial position of affecting their
children
directly and it is acknowledged parenting is important in
children
’s development. So, I totally disagree with
this
statement. Of course,
parents
can help with their kid’s
homework
, but
children
should have to learn self-management and problem-solving abilities. These days, it is on the table that
children
are becoming too much dependent on their
parents
. They learn how to manage themselves from their parent’s
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
and how their
parents
treat them. Spending time with their
children
is important.
Therefore
,
parents
should spend time with their kids in a productive and efficient way.
For example
, going for a walk in the park, having dinner together, or doing something active and enjoyable, not helping
homework
Change preposition
with homework
show examples
.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, they need to improve problem-solving skills when they are young. They can realize how can they solve various problems more wisely and efficiently later on.
Thus
, they would be able to deal with any problem or concern they may face
such
as those related to
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
or work.
For instance
, they can learn many things when they do
homework
by themselves,
such
as societal, mathematical, scientific,
even
Correct word choice
and even
show examples
cultural concepts.
Children
can learn how to approach each problem when they are doing assignments alone.
Parents
could encourage their kids to discuss with other
prople
Correct your spelling
people
when they face difficult problems or don’t have any clue about them. In conclusion, I do not agree that
parents
should help their kids with their
homework
. So,
children
should finish
homework
, and
parents
should encourage them to develop their independence and problem-solving skills.
Submitted by oyj1798 on

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clarity
Ensure clarity when expressing your stance on the topic. Although you mention disagreeing with the statement, the initial introduction could lead to a misunderstanding of your position.
transition
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grammar
Consider checking for minor typos or grammatical errors that might distract readers, despite them being minimal in your essay.
examples
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structure
You've done an excellent job in structuring your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
argumentation
Your stance on the issue is clear, and you've logically defended it with relevant reasons throughout the essay.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reiterates your position, reinforcing the essay's coherence.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • parental involvement
  • academic development
  • parent-child relationship
  • supported and encouraged
  • confidence and independence
  • educational strategies
  • autonomous learning
  • foster a love for learning
  • tailored interventions
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