The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with the health issues involved. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in the school curriculum. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is no doubt that the number of obese people is substantially increasing which has been straining the health care system. To counter the issue, people believe that more physical education classes should be added in schools. In my opinion, I completely agree that
this
is the best way to counter the issue of deteriorating health concerning weight.
Firstly
, dealing with the issue surrounding obesity and weight problems is best solved by taking a long term approach and introducing more sports and exercise in school.
This
method will ensure the future generation to be healthier and not have
such
problems.
For instance
, an average child does sport twice a week, which is not enough to counteract their sedentary lifestyle.
However
, by incorporating more sports and fitness classes, they will undoubtedly be fitter and active. Another point to consider is that having more sports for children in school will probably result in children developing an interest which might filter through other members of their family and have a longer effect.
In other words
, they would develop
this
as their habit and incorporate their lifestyle in adult life.
Moreover
, the parents being more involved with the kids would
also
be impacted by the benefits of increased physical activity.
This
is certainly a natural and long-lasting way to improve public health. In conclusion, to deal with an increasing population of unfit, overweight people, changing the lifestyle of the coming generation by introducing sports in curricular is the easiest and most effective method used.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • obesity rates
  • health care system
  • physical education
  • instill
  • long term
  • raise awareness
  • healthier lifestyle choices
  • nutritional education
  • active transport
  • quality of instruction
  • facilities and equipment
  • diet control initiatives
  • community sports programs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: