IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems

#people #time #loss #species #plants #animals
Environmental problems are harmful effects of human activity on the
environment
. Saving the natural
environment
 is humanity's duty for the
benefits
Fix the agreement mistake
benefit
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 of both, the
emvironment
Correct your spelling
environment
 and humans.
According to
 lots of articles about
environment
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the environment
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 ,
thesedays
Correct your spelling
these days
 there are some basic issues that human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
show examples
 must
be worry
Change the verb form
be worried
be worrying
show examples
 about and any of them is as important as the others. 1-Climate change
2-Over population
Correct your spelling
2-Overpopulation
3-Resource depletion 4-Water pollution and
other kind
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another kind
other kinds
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 of pollution like air and soil 5-Urbanization and developing the cities 6-Loss of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
plants
 and
animals
 are some of these issues.
Although
 there are lots of problems that people must be
concern
Wrong verb form
concerned
show examples
 about and find some
solution
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solutions
show examples
, I
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to, I
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 believe losing the species of
plants
 and
animals
 is the most important one. I think that
plants
 are insect's food
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 when
plants
 species disappear because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
climate change which is people's fault, it looks like insects have no food,
then
 insects will be disappeared and after a
while
 some
animals
 that are
feeden
Correct your spelling
feeding
feeder
 by insects will be gone and it won't have stopped, it will be happening for
other kind
Change the wording
another kind
other kinds
show examples
 of
animals
 and it is a huge modify in
natural
Add an article
the natural
a natural
show examples
environment
. In
fact
Add a comma
fact,
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 humans are changing the life cycle,
unfortunately
Add a comma
unfortunately,
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this
changing
Replace the word
change
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 is a huge damage
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 humans and the
environment
. In order to solve these problems or at least try to solve them, I can mention that we as human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
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 are living unsustainably and we are destroying our natural
environment
 which is nonrenewable, so
government
Correct article usage
the government
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,
sciencist
Correct your spelling
scientist
scientists
 and ordinary people must stay
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the same side to protect our world.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • extinction
  • habitat loss
  • ecosystem
  • food chain
  • imbalance
  • interconnected
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • personal actions
  • policy changes
  • education
  • awareness
What to do next:
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