Nowadays, people are moving to other countries to seek jobs. Some people think it affects the children of such home negativity while some others think it is beneficial to them. Discuss both sides and state your opinion

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Many

people

Use synonyms

these days are migrating to a foreign

country

Use synonyms

for jobs.

While

Linking Words

some

people

Use synonyms

think that it induces negativity in

children

Use synonyms

towards their home

country

Use synonyms

, others argue. In

others

Change noun form

other's

others'

show examples

opinion, it is beneficial for

children

Use synonyms

travelling

Change the verb form

to travel

show examples

abroad.

According to

Linking Words

me,

children

Use synonyms

should travel abroad so that they can learn to be independent and

also

Linking Words

learn different cultural values. On the one hand, there are

people

Use synonyms

how

Correct word choice

who

show examples

believe that

children

Use synonyms

who migrate to other countries begin to think

negative

Change the word

negatively

show examples

about their homeland.

This

Linking Words

is because,

according to

Linking Words

them once a child moves into a different nation they forget about the cultural values and

tradition

Fix the agreement mistake

traditions

show examples

which

was

Correct subject-verb agreement

were

show examples

inculcated in them as they were a child.

Moreover

Linking Words

, it makes

Change the article

show examples

individual rely on their family and relatives that they will never be able to survive

elsewhere

Linking Words

For example

Linking Words

, many students from India who travel to the US for

further

Linking Words

studies

goes

Change the verb form

show examples

on to apply for a green card and never return back to their home.

Hence

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is considered to negatively impact

people

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

, my view is that travelling abroad either to study or to work will only

instill

Change the spelling

instil

show examples

confidence in an individual. It is very important for

people

Use synonyms

to learn about other

countries

Change noun form

countries'

country's

show examples

culture

Fix the agreement mistake

cultures

show examples

and

tradition

Fix the agreement mistake

traditions

show examples

and adopt the goods it has to offer.

This

Linking Words

will eventually make a

person

Use synonyms

more independent

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

boost the morale of a

person

Use synonyms

and make him successful.

For instance

Linking Words

, there are many entrepreneurs

such

Linking Words

as Sundar Pichai CEO of Google who has not only studied abroad but

also

Linking Words

migrated permanently and is very successful. If he never moved out of his home

country

Use synonyms

, he would have never become the

person

Use synonyms

he is today. In conclusion, even though there are some negative effects of migrating to a new

country

Use synonyms

, I believe there are many positives which

makes

Change the verb form

make

show examples

person

Use synonyms

successful and independent.

manish.namboodiri88Tue Oct 08 2019

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Make sure to provide a clear and balanced discussion for both sides. Consider providing more detailed examples or explanations to support your points.

coherence and cohesion

Improve the logical flow by using more linking words and phrases, which can help to guide the reader through your arguments more smoothly.

language accuracy

Revise your introduction to ensure clarity and correctness in phrasing. For example, instead of 'in others opinion', use 'in others' opinion'.

task achievement

Good attempt to provide a personal opinion and relate it to real-life examples, enhancing your argument.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay features distinct separate paragraphs for each argument, contributing to the overall organization.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

309 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

emotional stability
academic progress
emotional distress
gain employment
educational journey
exposure to diverse cultures
financial stability
worldview
enhanced earnings
quality of life
mitigate
interventions
comprehensive
enriching development

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people feel that boarding schools are an excellent option for children, while other people disagree for many reasons. Consider both sides of this debate and conclude.
Various circumstances exist that would compel parents to send their children to boarding school. Be that as it may, parents, psychologists, and policymakers often debate whether the nature of boarding schools presents positive or negative outcomes. This essay will explore arguments for both sides and provide detailed analysis to aid readers in arriving at their own conclusion.
6.5
band
Many people think that painting and music do not directly improve the quality of people. Therefore, government should not spend too much money on artistic projects. Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, many people in the community argue that painting or listening to music does not improve their quality of life properly. Hence, government should not use too much money on these projects. I totally agree and disagree at the same time.
6.5
band
Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
"Every year, several languages vanish. However, some people consider that adopting a global language
6
band
Many people believe that cloths or costumes are more responsible for the occurrence of rape. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In modern society, there is an argument that the government should raise the tax on sugary products in order to affect the average sugar intake from these goods whose high sugar content causes numerous health problems. From my perspective, I firmly believe that it is not a practical solution to make a decrease in the consumption of sweet food and soft drinks, which will be further explained in the following essay.
7
band
in schools and universities, some girls tend to choose arts subjects, while boys choose to studyscience subjects. What are the reasons? Do you think this trend should be changed?
Higher education provides various majors and subjects for every student to pursue. It is often discussed that the majority of boys rather choose to study science while girls prefer to study arts. I believe there are multiple reasons for this phenomenon that will be demonstrated in this essay below.

Nowadays, people are moving to other countries to seek jobs. Some people think it affects the children of such home negativity while some others think it is beneficial to them. Discuss both sides and state your opinion

Your opinion

Some people feel that boarding schools are an excellent option for children, while other people disagree for many reasons. Consider both sides of this debate and conclude.

Many people think that painting and music do not directly improve the quality of people. Therefore, government should not spend too much money on artistic projects. Do you agree or disagree?

Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Many people believe that cloths or costumes are more responsible for the occurrence of rape. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

in schools and universities, some girls tend to choose arts subjects, while boys choose to studyscience subjects. What are the reasons? Do you think this trend should be changed?