IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people say that the main purpose of television should be education while others says it should be for entertainment only. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #purpose #television #education #entertainment
Television
 has been the
source
 of
entertainment
 since its invention. The contemporary has originated two schools of thought. There is one with the belief that it should be used primarily for the educative purpose while there are others who want it to be a
source
 of
entertainment
 only.
This
 essay will discuss both the viewpoints and will
also
 discuss why I want it to be used for both the learning and amusement.
To begin
 with, those who want to limit the use of
television
 to
education
Suggestion
educate
 only believes the advent of technology has brought several ways of
entertainment
such
 as mobile phones, tablets, video games.
Although
 these gadgets can be equally used for learning it depends on the usage of the children and can’t keep an eye on them all the
time
. To illustrate, children are given mobile phones to take help in their studies or convey the message to their parents during their late arrival at home, but the depressing thing is that they spend most of their
time
 on social media platforms. Another reason is that it will help parents to make their children devote some
time
 to learning new things.
This
 is because of the cut-throat competition demands for the high IQ from each of the pass outs. Considering the future of children people
favor
Suggestion
favours
favour
this
 notion. On the other, some people want to have
entertainment
 on
television
.
Firstly
, many people in developing countries belong to the lower middle class.
Television
 is the only
source
 of
entertainment
 for them.
For example
, those who do
labor
a social class comprising those who do manual labor or work for wages
labour
 for earnings cannot afford any technology or trip to any hill station. They have hardly managed to bring a
television
 to their home to relax their minds.
Secondly
, the old age in our society
is not prompt
Suggestion
is not prompted
doesn't prompt
does not prompt
 in learning new technologies.
Television
 is the medium which helps them to pass their free
time
 at home. They are much
likely
Suggestion
more likely
 to watch religious programs to avoid travel to any particular place.
Hence
, masses just want to have
entertainment
 only. To conclude,
television
 is still an important part of life. I believe that
television
 should serve both the purpose of education and
entertainment
. It will quench the thirst of all types of audiences. It just depends on the utility, priority and not on restriction.
This
 essay discussed that single focused
television
 will help in building the IQ of children and will add a
source
 of education to the list of students.
This
 essay
also
 discussed the importance of
entertainment
 importance for poor and old age.
Submitted by jaspalmaan13 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Educational content
  • Traditional learning
  • Remote areas
  • Underprivileged areas
  • Leisure
  • Diverse content
  • Dramas
  • Comedies
  • Escapism
  • Hybrid approach
  • Lifelong learning
  • Technological advancements
  • Promoting awareness
What to do next:
Look at other essays: