Some people believe that if people are allowed to work after the age of 60, it would cause problems for younger people. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In most of the countries, people often retire once they cross 60.
Although
Linking Words
certain persons believe that the elderly ought to
work
Use synonyms
after the
age
Use synonyms
of 60, there are others who oppose
this
Linking Words
view, saying it causes various problems for the young generation. I agree with the latter notion due to a couple of reasons, which I will discuss
further
Linking Words
.
First
Linking Words
of all, if elder people are allowed to
work
Use synonyms
even after the
age
Use synonyms
of retirement, young employees or fresh graduates would be deprived of significant opportunities in various
job
Use synonyms
sectors.
In other words
Linking Words
, an organisation might not take them as they would be lacking in
work
Use synonyms
experience, technical skills, analytical skills, etc., as opposed to an experienced senior employee. Not only
this
Linking Words
, a fresher will not be able to get promotions in a respected company.
For instance
Linking Words
, a 2011 survey conducted in the US where a fraction of older persons was allowed to
work
Use synonyms
after the
age
Use synonyms
of 60 showed that various young employees were deprived of diverse
job
Use synonyms
opportunities in the market.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the elder person becomes a burden to his young family. As it is quite expensive to make ends meet, he will become financially dependent on his young children. As as result, the youngsters find it difficult to bear the expenses of their retired fathers, as it would be both financial and mental burden for them.
For example
Linking Words
, in 2010 an article published in the New York Times reported that a mere 40% of the young population in the US itself could financially support their retired family members.
Conversely
Linking Words
, there are others who advocate that a person ought to be allowed to
work
Use synonyms
even after he crosses the
age
Use synonyms
of 60. One
such
Linking Words
reason is the
job
Use synonyms
skill
such
Linking Words
elderly people have.
In other words
Linking Words
, they contributed their lives to the organisations, and thereby, they
also
Linking Words
possess massive amounts of technical skills required for the company. But
this
Linking Words
is not a strong argument as the young generation of today's world tend to have varied
job
Use synonyms
skills and talent, as soon as they complete their graduations.
This
Linking Words
problem could be curbed by the respected senior managers and directors in an organisation by taking in more of these young talents.
Thus
Linking Words
, after analysis,
this
Linking Words
drawback is not that discouraging as it may seem. To conclude, I agree with the fact that people should not be allowed to
work
Use synonyms
after the
age
Use synonyms
of retirement, as it will pose problems for younger people,
such
Linking Words
as deprivation of jobs and other financial issues.
Submitted by ahmedsajid278 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: