There are many types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important and should it be preserved or is international music that is heard everywhere nowadays more useful to a society?

#music #world #country #society

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Music

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exists in some form or another in every culture around the world and it provides enjoyment to millions of people.

However

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, some people are concerned that traditional

music

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is being lost because of the popularity of international

music

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. Without a doubt,

music

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is a necessity.

Firstly

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music

Suggestion

the music

is important as it provides enjoyment and pleasure in daily life. People listen to

music

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to relax at home, to relieve the boredom of long journeys, and to dance to in the evening at

clubs

Suggestion

the clubs

. Not only

this

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music

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also

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an expression of culture, often being an essential part of religious ceremonies

such

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as weddings and funerals or yearly festivals. It is

also

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now common in educational development as children learn to play

music

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at school. In considering which kind of

music

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is the most important, international

music

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is certainly useful to society because it can be argued that it helps us to understand and relate to other people, cultures and countries as we all listen to the same songs.

This

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has occurred as globalization means Western

music

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is heard around the world.

However

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, it is critical that

this

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is not at the expense of traditional

music

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. It should be a priority to preserve

this

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since it teaches people about their history, and helps societies remember and retain their national and cultural identity. To conclude, I would argue that one type of

music

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is not more important or useful than another. Traditional

music

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is vital and should be preserved as it is part of a country’s cultural identity, but both are needed as they provide enjoyment to people in different ways.

Submitted by sodhifamily456011 on Sun Oct 20 2019

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Your opinion

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

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There are many types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important and should it be preserved or is international music that is heard everywhere nowadays more useful to a society?

Your opinion

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

In many countries today, women have full-time jobs. Therefore, it is reasonable to share housework equally between men and women.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions

Many manufactured food and drinks contain high level of sugars which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?