IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible.others believe that some information is too valuable to be shared freely. discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #information
The graph illustrates how much money is spent by people in the UK per week in 2004-05. It includes a range of products and services
such
 as transport, housing, food and clothing. The biggest expenditure was transported (£60 per week) and the lowest expenditure was health (£5). The
second
 biggest expense after transported was recreation and culture (£59). The items which came 3rd and 4th on the list were food and drink (£45) and housing and bills (£40). After that came restaurants and hotels (£36) with a little less spent on goods and services (£35). Only £24 a week was spent on clothing and footwear, followed by communication (£12) and alcohol and tobacco (£11). Just above health, at the bottom of the list was education, which only constituted about £7 of the total weekly expenditure. In conclusion,
although
 the essential items
such
 as food, housing and fuel took up a large percentage of the weekly costs, it is interesting to see that there was still a substantial amount available for recreation, transport and going to hotels and restaurants.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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