Some people think that the government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children, while others think that it is the fault of the parents.Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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In recent times,
obesity
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is on the rise among children, which is a result of unhealthy eating. Some people say that the
government
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is responsible for the increase in corpulence in children, while others blame their parents.
This
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essay will discuss both sides of the argument and provide evidence as to why the
government
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is responsible for
this
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health issue. One of the main reasons that causes
obesity
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is the consumption of packaged foods which has a lot of preservative and additives and
this
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causes all the health issues among children. The
government
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should have taken steps to reduce sale of packaged edible products
such
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as chips, aerated drinks, chocolates, and ice creams by increasing the sales tax for all these products which will alleviate the consumption of these edibles.
For instance
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, If the
government
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had levied a 30% sales tax on chips, children would not have preferred buying it as it would have been expensive.
Therefore
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, raising the price of unhealthy food could have easily put an end to the
obesity
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issue among children. On the other side, parents must have created awareness about the healthy food options among their children.
This
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would have helped the kids make wiser food choices
such
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as consumption of fruits, juices, vegetables
instead
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of chips and other packaged foods.
For example
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, a recent survey shows that 80% of children consume salted potato chips during their snack break, which could have easily been replaced by an apple or other fruits.
Thus
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, it is a parent’s duty to modify their child’s diet. In conclusion, even though some people blame the parents for not controlling their children’s diet, in my opinion, the
government
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is primarily responsible for the
obesity
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among children as it failed to levy more taxes on packaged foods.
Submitted by niveditharavi31 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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