Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #music #cultures #ages

There are many famous songs that people can feel like a unity in the world. Some people believe that

music

can make people

one

special group, regardless of different cultures and ages. I will agree with that

music

is a good way to be together.

First

of all,

music

has a powerful strength to move people’s mind. There have been shown a lot of instances,

such

as K-Pop,

Hiphop

an urban youth culture associated with rap music and the fashions of African-American residents of the inner city

hip-hop

, Jazz and so on. K-Pop is becoming more and more

popular so

Accept comma addition

popular, so

lots of fans over the world gather to see the K-pop stars in a concert. They have different nationalities and

backgrounds but

Accept comma addition

backgrounds, but

they have the only same interest that they love K-pop.

Likewise

misic

an artistic form of auditory communication incorporating instrumental or vocal tones in a structured and continuous manner

music

can make people move their mind and it can cause them to put in the same place.

Secondly

music

can make people same goals.

For example

, in the World cup, we usually use the

music

for uniting and cheering a team up. The team in a match is significantly influenced by the

music

. So, the team and the sponsors can be together and they can focus on the match more. I have argued that the power of

music

is amazing because people can be

one

not subject to defeat

won

easily when they have some goals. In conclusion, there are several reasons that

music

one

of the best

way

Suggestion

ways

to gather together, but I have argued that when people listen to the same

music

, they can be aware of being

one

group and they can have

same goals

Suggestion

the same goals

Therefore

refers to the speaker or writer

think

music

is a good way to Unite people.

Submitted by leslieyou8484 on Tue Dec 03 2019

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

260 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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11 Most Commonly Used English Expressions »

Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Space exploration is too expensive and money should be spent on more important things. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that entertainers such as film stars, pop musicians and sports stars are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other type of Job should be highly paid?

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.