Doctors, nurses and teachers make a great contribution to society and should be paid more than entertainment and sports celebrities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#doctors #nurses #teachers #contribution #society #entertainment #sports #celebrities

It is widely acknowledged that people who

work

in the hospital and

school

are of great importance due to the fact that they are either saving people’s lives or educating our students.

As a result

this

, from my perspective, doctors, nurses and educators should be paid more than famous stars in the entertainment and sports fields because of the time-consuming preparation of their

work

and the far-reaching impact of their

work

on other people’s lives. The time-consuming preparation of hospital and

school

staff

needed to be acknowledged and

then

be paid more than entertainers and sports stars.

In other words

, it is very common for hospital and

school

staff

work

overtime and even longer hours to finish their tasks.

For example

, teachers spend most of their spare time

doing

the act that results in something coming to be

making

lesson plans for students and surgeons usually

work

non-stop for more than 24 hours to finish the

operation whereas

Accept comma addition

operation, whereas

entertainers and sports stars only need to perform at a lesser frequency. Thereby, it is important to recognise the extra time and effort they have committed

for

Suggestion

their job and pay them more money.

Although

entertainers and sports stars can have

affect

Suggestion

affected

people positively, hospital and

school

staff

have a far more reaching influence on other people. Doctors and nurses not only help patients minimize their pain, but they shape the whole society on health-related issues,

similarly

, teachers equip students with the necessary knowledge and skills as well as shaping the future generation.

For instance

in addition

to save people’s lives, doctors and nurses are the authorities on designing and implementing the health policy which has a crucial influence on the whole society’s health. The same can be applied to teachers as they are in the position to voice the future education.

Therefore

, doctors, nurses and teachers should be rewarded more financially than celebrities in entertainment and sports business. In conclusion, hospital

staff

and educators should be paid more money than famous stars in the entertainment business

as a result

of their huge contribution to individuals and the society as a whole.

Submitted by eramos on Sun Dec 08 2019

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

342 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

contribution
essential services
long hours
stressful
well-being
development
entertain
inspire
exorbitant salaries
unfair
talented individuals
professions

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Doctors, nurses and teachers make a great contribution to society and should be paid more than entertainment and sports celebrities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what are the possible solutions?

In some countries, most people prefer to rent a house rather than buy their houses. What are the advantages of renting a home? Should governments subsidies house prices for first home buyers?

Research has shown that spending much less time in office can reduce the use Of use of energy (for example electricity, gas). Thus some companies Cole for some days a week. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantage?

Some expert believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondry school.do the advantages of this outweight the disadvantage?