Women are better at childcare than men therefore they should focus more on raising children and less on their working life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is argued that women are better caretakers than men and
hence
Linking Words
they should concentrate more on bringing up children and less on their careers.
This
Linking Words
essay disagrees with that opinion because their natural care taking quality is what sets them apart from the opposite gender.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
essay will discuss how the aid-giving trait in women is an advantage in their careers and
secondly
Linking Words
, how their successful work life contributes to a healthy environment at home. Women are known to possess a natural nurturing quality in them. It is
this
Linking Words
aspect that proves to be an advantage in their careers. They have a higher emotional quotient than men and their compassion and kindness towards others can be beneficial to their work life.
For example
Linking Words
, my friend Rachel who was in the human resources department at my previous company, Ernst & Young, was promoted to a managerial position due to her ability to connect and show empathy towards employees. Whereas John, another friend of mine, who joined the company at the same time as she remained in the same position. Successful women contribute to a healthy environment at home. Women are the centrepiece of a family and the happiness of the family directly depends on them. Working women find that having a career makes them feel accomplished and self-sufficient.
This
Linking Words
in turn gives them happiness. To illustrate, my aunt Emma, was having a hard time when she decided to take a year off from her job to take care of her newborn daughter. She missed working and felt taking a year off might make her redundant.
As a result
Linking Words
, she would often feel resentment towards her daughter.
However
Linking Words
, a few months later, she decided to take up a part-time job and
this
Linking Words
turned out to be the best decision she ever made. She felt fulfilled at work and her happiness reflected onto her family as well. In conclusion, women shouldn’t concentrate on taking care of kids over their careers because their nurturing abilities are what helps them in their careers and it leads to a healthier atmosphere at home.
Submitted by zeba_spice on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender roles
  • nurturing
  • empathy
  • sensitivity
  • maternal instinct
  • paternal involvement
  • child's development
  • work-life balance
  • gender equality
What to do next:
Look at other essays: