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Writing Samples
Band 5

Stress-related illness are becoming increasingly common. What do you think are the cause for this ? What solutions can you suggest ?

#illness
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People affected by
stress
Use synonyms
 associated illness are rapidly increasing.
This
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 essay will discuss the two major factors that contributes to pressure related sickness and
also
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 provides suggestions to overcome them. Two vital places which are source of origin for
stress
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 are
work
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 and family. Even though people spend most of their lifetime at
work
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, many of them were not happy about their
work
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 or their employer.
This
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 naturally leads to
stress
Use synonyms
 related illness.
For instance
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, employees under a poor manager will always face
high level
Suggestion
high levels
a high level
 of
stress
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 compared to the workers under reputed manager.
Secondly
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, family plays an influential role in creating the pressure. Level of
stress
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 will increase because of the constant altercation between husband and wife.
For example
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, partners who are going through the divorce or on the edge of getting divorced will suffer from mental pressure compared to others who have
peaceful family life
Suggestion
a peaceful family life
. These
emphasizes
Suggestion
emphasize
 that improper
work
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 environment and poor family
relationship
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 will attribute to
stress
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 among the people. Finding an appropriate
job
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 and getting help on the family
relationship
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 will definitely reduce the mental and physical struggle among the people. Rather than spending the lifespan on miserable
job
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,
its
it is
it's
 crucial to find an ardent
job
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. In order to relieve from
stress
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, my friend gave up his software development
work
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 and switched his career path to teaching. To improve the family
relationship
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, if needed people can reach out to
therapist
Suggestion
a therapist
the therapist
.
Although
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 partners can communicate with each other on the dispute, they should not be shy to reach for external help.
Stress
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 can be averted to
great extent
Suggestion
a great extent
 by finding a quality
job
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 and seeking help on
relationship
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. To conclude, in
modern world
Suggestion
the modern world
 more and more people are becoming ill as
result
Suggestion
a result
 of
stress
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.
This
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 essay discussed how
stress
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 is caused by unhappiness at
work
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 and week family
relationship
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.
This
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 essay
also
Linking Words
 suggested how finding a better
job
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 and reaching
out to therapist
Suggestion
out to a therapist
 for family issues will protect people from
stress
Use synonyms
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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