Some people believe that to be a successful sportsperson, one needs to have a natural ability. Others think that hard work and practice are more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
While some people argue that being a victorious athlete requires inherent ability, others believe that the key factors are
endeavor
a purposeful or industrious undertaking (especially one that requires effort or boldness)
endeavour
and
workout
Suggestion
work out
. There are rational arguments on both sides of
this
contentious topic which will be discussed in detail, followed by my own take on the matter. On the one hand, many people think someone success in sport just because they had inborn power.
the
Suggestion
The
major fact about
this
mindset is that;
firstly
, they didn’t know anything about consequences of effort and rehearsal.
Secondly
, their parents had said
this
opinion to them for
years so
Accept comma addition
years, so
they think about
this
like an actuality.
For instance
, I can remember my friend’s father had constantly said that to her daughter:
this
is a truth my
darling you
Accept comma addition
darling, you
cannot succeed in gymnastic because you haven’t innate strength.
Finally
, maybe they had much attempt and exercise in
sport but
Accept comma addition
sport, but
they didn’t promote therefor, they had concluded
this
fact.
On the other hand
, others think rehearsal and
labor
a social class comprising those who do manual labor or work for wages
labour
play a
key role to in
Suggestion
key role in
achieving success. They think like
this
due to maybe they did
this
trend in their sport field and they are aware about these
outcome
Suggestion
outcomes
.
However
, one cannot be a champion without hard work and exercises anyways.
Although
, they should do
this
workout with target and scheme to be more successful. Take
scheme
Accept comma addition
scheme, for
for example
, I can recall my friend had a basketball match.
she
Suggestion
She
had practiced every day for 7 hours and she had rich diet.
Finally
, she won a gold prize. To put it differently,
this
mindset would be the result of prosperities which didn’t
occurred
Suggestion
occur
without great effort and
labor
a social class comprising those who do manual labor or work for wages
labour
. To conclude, there are valid arguments on both sides of the controversy; on balance,
however it
Accept comma addition
however, it
is my firm conviction that victories can happen if we had great
endeavor
a purposeful or industrious undertaking (especially one that requires effort or boldness)
endeavour
and practice.
Submitted by eshtiaghi.zahra on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: