Many adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

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Nowadays, mature people find computer

games

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engaging and they spend their leisure

time

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playing

such

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kinds of

games

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. From my perspective, these are made in a certain way to provide a sense of pleasure

however

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it has negative effects. In

this

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essay, reasons for

this

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trend

as well as

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drawbacks will be discussed. The animated gaming is at its zenith because of the technological improvements in the field of graphics.

Due to

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this

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, animation makes its users feel that they are a part of it. They feel appeased when they win the

game

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however

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when they lose, it pressurizes them even more to win the

game

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Thus

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, they become addicted to

such

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types of

games

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For example

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, there are many video

games

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that are related to a war kind of environment

such

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as Free Fire. In fact, the user controls one of the soldiers and teams up with his friends to attack the other team in it. It is played with peers and many people enjoy spending free

time

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playing it. In turn, it helps them to

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while

Verb problem

stay

show examples

away from their busy schedule.

On the contrary

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, computer

games

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have some negative outcomes. Some individuals get so engrossed in these activities that they lose track of their precious

time

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and it results in forming bad habits. They never value the importance of

time

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and their mind gets affected by the way they play and communicate in the

game

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. To exemplify, in India, a news reporter described a story of a person who was convicted of felony charges of killing his father who was not allowing him to play a

game

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. The violence happening in the

game

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had a deep impact on his thinking.

To conclude

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, undoubtedly, computer

games

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are helping a lot of adults to feel relaxed.

On the other hand

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, it

also

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wastes important hours of one's life which could have been used towards doing something constructive. Not only it wastes

time

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but

also

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it has resulted in behavioural changes.

Overall

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, gaming should be an occasional event , not a consistent habit.

KiranSat May 18 2024

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task achievement

You have provided a clear and comprehensive response to the task, effectively explaining why adults play computer games and discussing the positive and negative aspects. To improve, you could delve deeper into both sides of the argument to present a more nuanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is logically structured, and your ideas flow well from one point to the next. However, consider using more transitional phrases to improve the connectivity between your points.

coherence cohesion

Your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively set the stage and wrap up your arguments.

task achievement

You have provided relevant and specific examples to support your points, which strengthens your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

342 words

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Many adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do the advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages ?

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The threat of nuclear weapons maintains world peace. Nuclear power provides cheap and Clean energy. The benefits of nuclear energy far outweigh the disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sports or music and others not. Discuss both view and your opinion.