IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some developed countries have reduced the number of school hours. Is this a positive or negative development?

#countries #school #hours #development
Shortening of the
school
day
 is a topic that has been debated a lot recently. There are advantages and disadvantages associated with the
school
day
, which shall be analysed in
this
 essay. I believe it is largely a negative development. On the downside, a shortened
school
day
 would reduce the amount of instructional
time
. For some laboratory classes, reducing the number of minutes in class each
day
 could have a detrimental impact. Shorter segments of instructional
time
 might diminish the quality of instruction. Biology, chemistry, art, physical education and music classes all have the potential to be detrimentally affected.
Secondly
, if the
school
day
 were shortened, the system might have to reduce the number of vacation days or add days at the beginning or end of the
school
 year in order to satisfy the hours requirement.
Finally
, it would add to the stress of finding
day
 care for after
school
 hours for those parents who are working full
time
. On the positive side, reducing the number of hours would allow extra
time
 for students to participate in additional or vocational experiences. Students from lower income families would have more
time
 for an after-
school
 job to provide supplemental income to their parents. Students might
also
 have the opportunity to participate in internships, perform community service, take advanced classes or investigate another activity that might broaden their intellectual horizons.
Furthermore
, there may be some financial savings to the
school
 as teachers would work fewer hours and
therefore
, would get less pay. The utilities,
such
 as heating, air conditioning, electricity, of the actual
school
 buildings would be used less and contribute to the savings.
For example
, the potential savings of shortening a
school
day
 by 1.5 hours might result in a savings of 6 percent to 20 percent of the overall budget, depending upon buildings and staffing. To sum up, shorten the
school
 hours would have pros and cons, but the disadvantages far outweigh the advantages.
Submitted by patel.suhag01 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • balanced lifestyle
  • stress and burnout
  • self-directed learning
  • conventional curriculum
  • family bonds
  • academic rigor
  • gaps in knowledge
  • socioeconomic backgrounds
  • extracurricular activities
  • supplement
  • personalized and adaptive learning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: