IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people mke? Has this become a positive or negative development?

#people #technology #relationships #mke #become #development
These days technology takes an important place in our daily life. Indeed, people interact together through their mobile phone.
Thus
, the new generation,
particularly become
Suggestion
particularly becomes
 unsociable. In my opinion,
this
 is a negative development in certain ways. People prefer to send messages
instead
 of talking face to face. When, they need an information or just have some news of their family or friends. They prefer to send them a message on
social network
Suggestion
social networks
a social network
the social network
.
For example
, the professor Testart from the CNRS wrote an article where he explains that even if they live under the same roof. They prefer to send
message
Suggestion
messages
 than knocking at the door. I believe that in a few years people will only interact with each other through their cutting-edge devices.
Moreover
, people prefer to use
application
Suggestion
the application
 to make new relationships. A few years ago, people met their friends in bars and a party, whereas nowadays they prefer to chat online thanks to
dating site
Suggestion
the dating site
a dating site
. So, everything is doing virtually and in some case, they do not even know the person they are talking to.
For instance
, they prefer to encounter a person only after the software proved that they have the same affinity.
Therefore
, I am sure that people have more difficulty to talk with others when they are with a group of friends. In conclusion, since a few years technology has changed our way to communicate with each other.
This
affect
a phenomenon that follows and is caused by some previous phenomenon
effect
, a lot our relationships. For
this
reasons
Suggestion
reason
, people prefer to interact together through social media and make new friends thanks to dating applications.
Submitted by fatimalahouel806 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: