IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people believe that after a child enters school their teachers will have more influence than their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #child #school #teachers #influence #parents
It is believed that educators are more influential in the students' lives than their own parents. Personally, I partially agree with
this
 notion due to the following reasons. On the one hand, after enrolling in a
school
, pupils tend to spend more time in classes than at home, since most educational institutions run full-time curriculums,
therefore
, teachers might have a greater lapse of life to share their knowledge with the kids than other adults.
For instance
, social studies have shown that American
schoolars
a learned person (especially in the humanities); someone who by long study has gained mastery in one or more disciplines
scholars
schools
 stay an average of 10 hours at
school
, which leads the family to only stay 5 hours with their children before sleeping time.
Additionally
, educators have fewer difficulties to teach adolescents and children, thanks to the academic training that helps to overcome common challenges of youngsters, as a consequence, pupils are more or less likely to listen to teachers in comparison to parents.
Conversely
, the emotional attachment among family members may help to influence children, as people tend to admire and respect more loved ones than others,
as a result
, they might become their principal role models.
For example
, if a loving family commonly goes to the church, the following generation will probably have the same religion, which would not happen in an abusive family.
Moreover
, parents are for life while teachers
last
 for a year, because
school
 years are only a part of someone's life,
consequently
 restricting the influence of professional from the education system over youngsters. To conclude,
although
 teenagers and children may be influenced by teachers who spend a significant spare of time with them during
school
, mothers and fathers may be stronger influences due to their emotional bond.
Submitted by bele_sales on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: