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Writing Samples
Band 8

The prevention of health problems and health illness is more important than treatment and medicine. Government funding should reflect this. To what extent do you agree.

#prevention #health #illness #treatment #medicine #government
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It is an undeniable fact that the prevention of diseases is better than curing the same. A school of thought believes that the
government
Use synonyms
 should be funding to take precautionary measures. In my opinion, I strongly agree that there should be an appropriate funding to prevent health issues and illness in people.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the
government
Use synonyms
 should be releasing sufficient funds to maintain the cleanliness of the country. Because
this
Linking Words
 approach will
end the outbreak of
Suggestion
end with the outbreak of
 any infectious disease, which is caused by poor hygiene of a place.
For example
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, a research conducted by the World Health Organisation demonstrated that 90% of the illness in a society is caused by the unhealthy environment.
As a result
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 of unhealthiness the public living in that area gets infected ad
this
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 will be spreading rapidly across the nation, which puts a pressure on the
government
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
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, the
government
Use synonyms
 should be spending more on medical researches.
In other words
Linking Words
, medical scientists will have better knowledge on how to prevent deadly diseases, which paves the way for a nation to save the lives of their own people and that country becomes the talk of the world.
For instance
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, pasteurization of milk was invented by the US scientist, which not only saves many lives now but
also
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 crowned America with glory.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 invention is helping the entire globe to stay away from the diseases caused by the unpasteurised milk. In conclusion, I argue that the
government
Use synonyms
 funding should reflect the prevention of health issues and illness by maintaining cleanliness and by focusing more on researches to prevent any deadly diseases.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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