IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use.

The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use.
#first #energy #australian #household #second #greenhouse #gas #emissions
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The pie charts illustrate the portion of
Use synonyms
energy
Add an article
the energy
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 used by an Australian, and
consequences
Correct article usage
the consequences
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resulted
Wrong verb form
resulting
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 in
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
emission
Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
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 from the used
energy
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, an Australian household uses
majority
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the majority
a majority
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 of power in heating, and
energy
Use synonyms
 consumed in water heating produces the highest
greenhouse
Use synonyms
 gases. The uses of
energy
Use synonyms
 in Australia can be categorized
in
Change preposition
into
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 six different sections.
While
Linking Words
energy
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 used in heating contributes the highest portion, at 42%, the
energy
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 used in cooling remains at the lowest, at 2%.
Similarly
Linking Words
,
one
Add a hyphen
one-third
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third
Linking Words
 of
energy
Use synonyms
 is utilized in water heating, which is the
second
Linking Words
 highest contributor. The
combine
Replace the word
combined
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energy
Use synonyms
 consumption in refrigeration, lighting
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and other appliances
stand
Correct subject-verb agreement
stands
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 at 26%. The
greenhouse
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 gases are majorly produced by
utilization
Correct article usage
the utilization
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 of
energy
Use synonyms
 in water heating and other appliances, at 32% and 28% respectively. When heating and refrigeration emit the same amount of
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
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, at 15%,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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lighting and cooling contribute only 11% to the total
greenhouse
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gas
Use synonyms
 emission. Interestingly,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cooling is the lowest in
energy
Use synonyms
 utilization
as well as
Linking Words
 in the generation of
greenhouse
Use synonyms
gas
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by pratichee.spk on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, greenhouse, gas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Energy consumption
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Sustainable practices
  • Energy efficiency
  • Renewable energy
  • Fossil fuels
  • Carbon footprint
  • Eco-friendly appliances
  • Insulation
  • Solar panels
  • Recycling
  • Climate change
  • Kilowatt-hour (kWh)
  • Emissions-intensive
  • Energy audit
  • Smart meters
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