IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Each year, the crime rate increases. What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#year #crime #rate #increases #rise #activity
It is quite obvious that offences are exponentially increasing day by day and it is the alarming issue of the society. I personally believe that unemployment and illiteracy are the major reasons behind it.
This
 essay will delve deeper into causes and various protective measures to minimise the crimes.
To begin
 with, the
first
 and foremost reason is lack of job opportunities to the people in the market. When the person is unable to fulfil the financial requirements of his family and meet basic survival needs than he commit a crime like robbery to earn more money within less time.
Secondly
, due to unawareness about the repercussions of the offence and the laws against it, results in allowing the people to commit as individuals think that they have freedom to do whatever they want to.
Thus
, to stop
this
 trend the government has to take strict actions against criminals so that they think twice before doing any sort of crime in the locality.
For example
, capital punishment against serious crimes, particularly rape, murder; is one of the best action to warn others. Apart from
this
, proper rehabilitation should be provided to the offenders and they must be treated well in the society so that they lead their normal life after imprisonment and never commit crimes again. To conclude,
although
 crimes are increasing due to unemployment and unawareness,
however
, the government and the society should join hands against crimes and with strictness and politeness, they must take measures to mitigate the crime rate.
Submitted by gagankaur005 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: