Some people who have been is prison become good citizen later, some people think that they are the best people to talk to the school student about the danger of committing a crime. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #prison #citizen #school #student #danger #crime

It is true that we should aware of the how any

crime

has happened. In that era we aware of our children to

do not

Accept comma addition

do, not

doing

such

kind of activity to catch in prison. So

Suggestion

from

that point of view, some of the people say that the ex-prisoners are given the talk to

school

student

about the danger of committing a

crime

. In

this

easy, I describe what kind of

way

Suggestion

a way

to teach the

student

and my opinion. On the one hand, there are many ex-prisoners are good and mix with our society after the

jail

, and he or she aware about

the how the guards

Suggestion

how the guards

are treated

with

Suggestion

them and how the food is available for them. So

Suggestion

from

that point, they give a little talk to

school

student

about not committing any

miscommunicating

thing to catch on the prison.

For example

, we arrange one session in

school

about how we can avoid

such

kinds of activities. And

also

they would feel better by sharing their stories and

this

is a great way to stay away from

crime

for these people.

On the other hand

instead

interact

Suggestion

interacting

interaction

interactions

with ex-prisoners, we forgot that they committed a

crime

and after that, they teach to the

student

. Perhaps, we do not interact with

them but

Accept comma addition

them, but

we provide the movie session based on the true story of prisoners in

jail

and how they are treated.

Also

, they could see the quality of food that criminals are distributed and feel that it is

totally

Suggestion

total

waste of life in

jail

instead

of using that time to improve life goals.

is the

government stricter

Accept comma addition

government, stricter

laws related to juvenile

crime

For example

, some

student

who commits pickpocketing and robbery are

refuse

Suggestion

refusing

from the

school

and sent to the

jail

. In conclusion,

instead

of interact with the

student

to prisoners who is live past in

jail

, they do not teach like

this

way. We taught them by different movies, and series of

crime

and that related.

Submitted by divyeshkakadiya951 on Wed Feb 12 2020

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

330 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people who have been is prison become good citizen later, some people think that they are the best people to talk to the school student about the danger of committing a crime. Do you agree or disagree?

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The increasing housing problem in big cities has social consequences. Some people say that only governments can solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Establishing good relationships in the workplace is not important, as the primary goal of every person is to focus on work. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Many people eat junk food these days, which is not good for health. This problem has become more among young people these days. what are the causes and solutions for this trend?

In the past, buildings often reflected the culture of a society but today all modern buildings look alike and cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What do you think is the reason for this, and is it a good thing or a bad thing?