"Prevention is better than cure." Out of a country's health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and preventative measures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It is often said that "
health
Use synonyms
is wealth". Out of a
nation
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nation's
show examples
strength expenditure, an enormous ratio ought to be shifted from treatment to expense on
health
Use synonyms
education and preventable steps. I firmly
accord
Verb problem
agree
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that money should be spent on
health
Use synonyms
knowledge.
Firstly
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, if the money
divert
Wrong verb form
diverted
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in
Change preposition
to
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providing fitness knowledge, it would be a huge change because sometimes people do not know about
health
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literacy, and they
caught
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are caught
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up by some disease which can be treated but
treatment
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the treatment
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cost
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costs
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an arm and a leg. To exemplify, in
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the village
a village
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village
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villages
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so many people
caught
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are caught
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up
by
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in
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infectious
disease
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diseases
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which can be cured
by
Change preposition
with
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little education
of
Correct your spelling
or
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well-being.
Secondly
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, these measures can
take
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be taken
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by simply doing,
such
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as
tv
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TV
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commercial
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commercials
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,
advertisement
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advertisements
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, and street
show
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shows
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.
Moreover
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,
this
Linking Words
also
Linking Words
can be stopped by telling the side effects of tobacco and alcoholic drinks.
Furthermore
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, the government should encourage and aware the public
of
Correct word choice
aware of
show examples
diseases
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
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prevent
Wrong verb form
be prevented
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by doing yoga or gym.
For example
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an
Correct article usage
apply
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as
per report
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reported
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of
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by
show examples
Times
Correct article usage
the Times
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of India few studies
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
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the government initiative
of
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to
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stop smoking was successful
hence
Linking Words
of
Change preposition
apply
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the advertisements and street shows.
Finally
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,
these
Correct determiner usage
the
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moneys
Change the wording
money
amounts of money
sums of money
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spent on hygiene knowledge and preventable measures by countries are huge and after
certain
Add an article
a certain
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time
this
Linking Words
can be profitable for that country's economy and people can be able to spend that fund on good things.
To sum up
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, I agree that prevention is better than cure because
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
disease can be tackled via preventative measures and education so it ought to be the best spend on fitness information and preventable steps.
Submitted by hupinder on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • preventive measures
  • health education
  • public awareness
  • proactive approach
  • unsustainable
  • economic productivity
  • healthcare system
  • vaccinations
  • curative measures
  • comprehensive healthcare
  • financial burden
  • incidence
  • preventable diseases
  • eradicating
  • controlling
  • allocated
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