One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many people agree with the viewpoint that the sophisticated medical technologies help people lengthen their age.
However
Linking Words
, there is a growing belief that the increase of lifespan leads to rising medical spending, which may become a burden for these countries. In my opinion, I believe that the advantage outweighs the disadvantage. It is widely believed that the rise of life expectancy affects adversely the development of the nations. Because when the ratio of the elderly goes up, the national expenditures
on
Suggestion
for
medical services
also
Linking Words
increase and it becomes a burden for the countries. Take Japan as an example; the annual national spending report in 2019 stated that the percentage of money, which spent on
healthcare
Suggestion
health care
grants, holds the biggest percentage, approximately 55%.
Consequently
Linking Words
, it is holding back the development of
this
Linking Words
country because there is not sufficient money for investing
on
Suggestion
in
other sectors,
such
Linking Words
as
economics sector
Suggestion
an economic sector
economic sector
, infrastructure, etc.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, because of the cutting-edge healthcare technologies and treatments, we now can cure many terminal diseases, so it will make people live longer and
then
Linking Words
they can spend more time with their families. My grandfather,
for instance
Linking Words
, now is 76
year
Suggestion
years
-old. I lived with him when I was a child. He brought me up and be my best friend, who would listen everything I
told
being the one previously mentioned or spoken of
said
to him, even the innocuous things. But he was diagnosed a lung cancer 5 years ago. Fortunately, he was treated with a special therapy and after 6 months recovering, he came back home. Thanks to the development of medical care, I got my grandfather back. To conclude, my perspective is the positive effect of the modern medical facilities overshadows the drawback.
Submitted by trnyn942 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • life expectancy
  • elderly population
  • health care systems
  • pension funds
  • extended family relationships
  • quality of life
  • aging population
  • economic growth
  • volunteer work
  • expertise
  • financial planning
  • retirement
  • age-related diseases
  • medical research
  • healthier lifestyles
What to do next:
Look at other essays: