Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admissions to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

My purpose for writing to you is to request for a chance to be enrolled as a
computer
science student in
this
high-quality
university
. On the
first
day of primary
school
, my father came home after work with a
computer
and I was very happy, because I could play games and watch videos with it. I never gave up my relationship with my
computer
since that day and have been interested in the
computer
for a long
time
. In the
first
year
of high
school
, they asked what
profession we
Accept comma addition
profession, we
will want to do in the
future
, I thought for a long
time
and decided on
software
engineering because I was able to handle every job with the
computer
and I was not bored when I was at the
computer
. Sometimes I was editing photos of my friends and myself thanks to photo editing applications, sometimes I
have tried
Suggestion
try
to make small games. Since I love spending
time
on things I love and my hobbies, I attended the developing club of the
school
in the
second
year
of high
school
, and in the
last
year
of high
school
, I started the
software
course
to improve myself and go to
university
ready, and I am waiting for the day I will get a certificate.
In addition
to the
software
, I took a piano and guitar
course
in my middle
school
years, again in middle
school
, I was
in
Suggestion
on
the table tennis and football team of the
school
, and
also
I was playing football in an amateur club. I loved sports and music a lot, but in the
future I
Accept comma addition
future, I
decided to build my career
on
Suggestion
in
computing
such
as application development, website design and robotics because the
software
was broader and much more interesting to me. I made online sales
last
year
and earned some money to have experience. In
this
way, I realized that money was not earned easily and that I needed to improve myself professionally. I learned to make a website from the internet and the
course
I went and I made two websites for my mother’s company. I loved spending
time
with the
computer
and wanted to go
further
. In the final
year
of high
school
, I decided to move from my country to the United States for both a better education and a successful career. I convinced my family and took various exams. The place where I decided to settle was New Jersey, one of the most important states of America. It was one of the most glamorous states, both in terms of
future
job opportunities and the quality of universities. I immediately started researching schools in new jersey and started collecting information about Montclair State
University
, which is the
school
that attracts me the most, its distance to campus, its nature, and quality of education. Sports activities and
computer
science were better than I expected. After my researches, Montclair State
University
ranked
first
for me. To be
with
Suggestion
in
a friendly environment of educated people and to graduate from a good
university
in the
future
and work in a good job was all I wanted. Unlike my peers, the most crucial thing for me is improving myself in several subjects, and hobbies,
also
, I’m trying to find new hobbies and interests as much as possible. Sports and music take a big place in my life and I am thinking of advancing them alongside the
software
. In order to fully understand the courses taught at the
university
, I try to improve my English and learn the term as much as possible, and I use various applications for
this
and I prefer watching TV series, movies, videos etc. In English over Turkish. In my opinion, I’m an ambitious person who loves pursuing his passions. I believe that I will be able to add a lot to myself and become a well-equipped
software
developer
Suggestion
development
by making use of Montclair State
University
's facilities on campus, high level
computer
labs and rich
course
contents.
Submitted by umutcerin on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural heritage
  • Preservation
  • Exclusionary
  • Revenue
  • Artifact
  • Maintenance
  • Engagement
  • Admission fee
  • Cultural enrichment
  • Sustainable funding
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