IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

some people think that sport teaches children how to compete, while others belive that children learn teamwork. discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #sport #children #belive #teamwork
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
While some argue that children are taught to be competitive by playing sports, others are of the opinion that children gain an important life skill,
that is
Linking Words
, team
work
Use synonyms
. I am of the opinion that while
competition
Use synonyms
 is something
that is
Linking Words
 generated while playing sports, there is no better way to teach children how to
work
Use synonyms
 in teams.
Competition
Use synonyms
 is undoubtedly an unpleasant emotion
that is
Linking Words
 generated while playing a sport. But like any negative emotion, it can be used to our advantage.
Similarly
Linking Words
, children should be taught to deal with
competition
Use synonyms
 in a healthy way and use it to perform better without creating a negative environment for the opposition.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, sports
isn’t
Suggestion
aren’t
 the only activity that
surfaces
Suggestion
surface
 feelings of
competition
Use synonyms
 among children. Academics, or any form of extracurricular can give rise to a competitive nature. The other side of the coin is the biggest advantage of sports: team
work
Use synonyms
. Learning how to
work
Use synonyms
 with other people, dealing with their weaknesses and strengths, and working towards growing as a group are a few of
many assets
Suggestion
the many assets
 that children can gain at a very early age when they take part in sports. When
this
Linking Words
 skill gets imbibed in the young minds, they grow up to be highly efficient adults. Adding to that, very few activities have
this
Linking Words
 positive effect. To sum up, even though there are downsides to being competitive, too much would be lost if children were to stop playing sports because of
this
Linking Words
 reason. Not only would
children
Suggestion
the children
 be unable to deal with
competition
Use synonyms
 in a constructive way, they wouldn’t either be capable of working with people as a team.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: