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Band 7

Now many people spend less and less time at home. What are the causes for this? What are the effects of this on individuals and on the society?

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It is true that nowadays plenty of people spend increasingly less
time
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 at their own apartment. There could be several reasons why
this
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 is the case, and I believe that
both
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 individuals and
society
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 would be influenced by the negative results brought by
this
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 phenomenon. There are various reasons why many people spend more
time
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 in the outside world.
Firstly
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, especially for youngsters, they have to work overtime for their hard-won jobs or ruthless enterprise culture. Given the fierce competition in modern
society
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 around the world, scarcity of jobs makes almost every person desperate to keep their job. Another reason why people seldom stay at home is that they have to go out to have fun. There are much more entertaining places outside than their narrow rented flat which was terribly boring. In my view, declining
time
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 at home has some negative effects
both
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 on individuals and
society
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. On the one hand, people's physical and mental health are
both
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 threatened by staying outside too long. As we know, staff usually order takeout at noon when they are at work, which has potential risks for their health.
Moreover
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, against the background of a faster and more competitive
society
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, we are suffering more and more pressure which probably leads to depression.
On the other hand
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, more social conflicts may be caused by
this
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 circumstance for lacking conversations and exchanges with family. In conclusion, I believe that working overtime is the principal reason why people spend less
time
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 at flat and
both
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 the health of people and social stability can be awfully influenced by it.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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