Countries with a long average working time are more economically successful than those countries which do not have a long working time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Working

culture

Fix the agreement mistake

cultures

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varied

Wrong verb form

vary

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widely all over the world. Western

countries

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such

Linking Words

as America and Britain have relatively shorter office

hours

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compared to Asian

countries

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. Some claim economic development is superior in those nations with longer working

hours

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. I wholeheartedly agree with

this

Linking Words

nation, as I will elaborate

the

Change preposition

on the

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following. Longer working

hours

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often can bring higher productivity. Nowadays, economic competition has become more severe. The country which has faster and larger productivity stands up easily. Take Taiwan

for example

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, people there tend to

work

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more than 12

hours

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a day,

along with

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fewer national holidays in comparison with Western

countries

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, and it is undeniable that Taiwan’s electric industry plays an indispensable role globally.

This

Linking Words

could be

due to

Linking Words

Taiwanese hard working characteristics.

Additionally

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, economic stability and prosperity can

also

Linking Words

result from a long working time.

This

Linking Words

work

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pattern brings opportunities for jobs, contributing to the reduction in

unemployment

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the unemployment

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rate.

However

Linking Words

, it still has certain drawbacks. Working for a long time may cause potential physical and mental

health

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problems. Worker’s rest and sleep time can be deprived, leading to harmful

health

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outcomes.

For instance

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, Japan is well-known for long

work

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hours

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. Though it is one of

economic

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the most economically

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successful nations, its suicide rate which is related to

work

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has climbed recently.

Consequently

Linking Words

health

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issues should not be underestimated, especially in those nations that have

this

Linking Words

long working pattern.

To conclude

Linking Words

countries

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with longer office

hours

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enable them to have higher productivity and be more competitive, making them have better economic development.

However

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, sometimes it is at the expense of the employer's

health

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, and people should be more aware of

this

Linking Words

issue to ensure the country's economic sustainability.

sandra19970823Tue Apr 02 2024

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Task Achievement

To enhance Task Achievement, ensure that your essay directly addresses the prompt throughout, presenting a clear stance with well-developed arguments. Including a wider variety of examples and demonstrating the impacts more comprehensively could further strengthen your response.

Coherence & Cohesion

A good range of linking devices and a clear progression of ideas contribute to a high score in Coherence and Cohesion. Consider varying your sentence structures more to elevate your writing. Paragraphs well designed with a clear central idea can enhance readability and flow.

Introduction & Conclusion

Your essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your argument which is beneficial for both task achievement and coherence.

Use of Examples

The use of specific examples, such as Taiwan and Japan, to support your points is excellent and contributes significantly to task achievement.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

275 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

economic success
working hours
productivity
sustainable development
work-life balance
labor laws
efficiency
gross domestic product (GDP)
burnout
occupational health
technological innovation
industrialized nations
emerging economies
workforce
competitiveness
workplace culture
employee turnover
quality of life

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Countries with a long average working time are more economically successful than those countries which do not have a long working time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, more and more adults are living with their parnets after graduating from college or even after finding a job. Do the advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

In many cities, planners tend to arrange shops, schools, offices and homes in specific areas and separate them from each other. Do you think the advantages of this policy outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that economic growth is the only way to end hunger and poverty, while others say that economic growth is damaging the environment so it must be stopped ? Dicuss both views and give your opion.

Aircrafts have been increasingly used to transport fruits and vegetables to some countries where such plants hardly grow or are out of season. Some people consider it a good trend, but some people oppose it. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Protecting the Environment: A Shared Responsibility" Question Type: To what extent do you agree or disagree?