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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Whether you are happy or not depends on the personality you are born with. Do you agree?

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Happiness
Use synonyms
 is a state of mind.
This
Linking Words
 state of mind is expressed through personal perceptions of the world and is provoked from the
environment
Suggestion
environmental
 factors. The way we interpret the world is determined in our
first
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 years of childhood, in which,
as a result
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 of interrelations with our parents and relatives, we become fully aware of our veracious perception of the world. The personality we are born with is a mixture of cultural patterns and personal perceptions, as well as
result
Suggestion
a result
the result
results
 of gene expression.
Use synonyms
Happiness
Accept comma addition
Happiness, therefore
therefore
Linking Words
 is an embodied feeling which arises based on our values, emotions, expectations and beliefs. There are many studies and theories about the
happiness
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. According to the Maslow's hierarchy of needs, individuals’ most basic needs must be met before they become motivated to achieve higher
level
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 needs. Physiological needs are the
first
Linking Words
level
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 in Maslow’s pyramid – they include health, food, home, clothes and money. After satisfying these needs,
happiness
Use synonyms
 begins to express itself in achieving the
next
Linking Words
level
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 of
pyramid
Suggestion
the pyramid
 which includes safety, love and belonging, until reaching the
last
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level
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 of self-actualization. As reported by other studies, according to their values, people generally fall into two categories – with intrinsic and extrinsic
value
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 systems. For the people with the intrinsic
value
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 system, belonging, meaning and competency are that values which made them happy. The other group, with the extrinsic
value
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 system,
were
we are
we're
 focused on high wealth, high income, high status and power. In my opinion, our
value
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 system (or what makes us happy) is pledged in ourselves, but it is
also
Linking Words
 a factor of the environment. The key
for
Suggestion
to
 being happy is to find our passion in
life
Use synonyms
, to engage with it in a way that brings
happiness
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, and to learn how to bring
this
Linking Words
 passion into our everyday
life
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. "I believe that
happiness
Use synonyms
 is a discipline" says Sharon Stone on the 2016 World Peace Conference. If you want to be happy, you have to choose to be. Many people are trying to complicate their
life
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,
instead
Linking Words
 of
make
Suggestion
making
 it easier and
therefore
Linking Words
 happier. A person who has found meaning, purpose and a passion in
life
Use synonyms
 will create the basis for the attainment of
happiness
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, or as the Dalai Lama has said "The secret to
happiness
Use synonyms
 is contentment".

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • extroversion
  • conscientiousness
  • agreeableness
  • neuroticism
  • openness
  • traits
  • behavior
  • environmental factors
  • upbringing
  • resilience
  • empathy
  • compatibility
  • relationships
  • personality disorders
  • self-awareness
  • psychology
  • interpersonal skills
  • career success
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