IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Some people argue that technological inventions, such as mobile phones, are making people socially less interactive. Do you agree or disagree.

#people #inventions #phones
There is no doubt that, the trend of technological inventions like the mobile phones is rising exponentially. Some people might argue, due to these inventions people are becoming less socially active and unable to interact. In my opinion, I think that it is absolutely true and especially in children, we can see these affecting a lot. The following consists the reason how these devices are affecting us.
To begin
 with, people are unable to express whatever the thoughts or their feelings to others.
This
 is mainly because, the majority of the time they are indulged with their smart devices, and always forget to care for the persons around them.
For example
, take the case of children, due to their tendencies towards technology, their relationship with others in decreasing drastically and
as a result
 they are unable to express their emotions.
This
 could eventually lead to other facts like taking less care of the parents in their odd times.
Furthermore
, due to these the communication skills of the addicted people are lowest.
This
 is because, to make it at its best one has to constantly interact with the social beings, and it makes them to know how to speak with others.
For example
, many people face stage fear because their communication skills are very low as they don’t know how to convey their message to a vast audience at the same time. So,
this
 leads to less focus towards to their career and eventually becomes a failure, unable to reach his desired goal. In conclusion, it is obvious to say that with the more interaction towards these innovations, it could lead to more distress in the lives of people due to their expressiveness and much more harmful to career due to their skills.
Submitted by saeeujwal2 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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