IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Nowadays, people have little awareness of the importance of the natural world. What are the reasons and how can people learn more about the natural world?

#people #awareness #importance #world
It is true that humans seem to be more distant from the natural
world
.
This
 essay will discuss some reasons why people do not understand its importance, and some ways they can learn more about it. On the one hand, technological advancements have increasingly driven people’s attention away from nature. Mobile phones and other gadgets have been introduced in people’s daily lives and seem to consume most of their
freetime
Suggestion
free time
.
Therefore
, when being off-work, people,
no longer engage
Suggestion
no longer engages
 with the natural
world
 in a way that the previous generation did, and
just stay
Suggestion
just stays
 indoors and spend their time on technology
instead
.
Moreover
, owing to developments in technology and the Internet, work is no longer restricted to the office space, leaving people busy even when returning home or on vacation.
Therefore
, leisure time has become a variety and people have little chance to appreciate the
world
 around them.
On the other hand
, park and green spaces should be well invested and promoted, when these natural placed become more attractive and they will more likely to draw people to visit and learn more about them.
For example
, parents should guide their children towards a lite of more contact with nature,
such
 as take part in going out for a picnic and visit national parks to broaden their horizon about natural creatures.
This
 could be done by arranging outing to a forest or lake rather than staying in resorts with limited contact with the outside
world
. To conclude, the government should make perks more appealing to the general public, and families should prioritize visits to the natural
world
 over other forms of vacation.
Submitted by dathv2007 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: