There are many things that motivate a person to work, but money is the most compelling. In your opinion, how influential is the power of money?

It is widely known that

Money

basically the backbone of modern human

civilazation

a society in an advanced state of social development (e.g., with complex legal and political and religious organizations)

civilization

. There are

plenthora

Suggestion

a plethora

plethora

of things that motivate people to work.

However

, Undoubtedly, The main motive is

money

, Because pupils

wants

Suggestion

want

fulfill

put in effect

fulfil

their daily needs.

This

essay will illustrate

money

's potential power.

Money

control people's mind.

Its

Suggestion

It's

increasingly common to know that whom possess

money

possess people. One of the most obvious example

Suggestion

of this corruption is

this

is corruption. Especially,

Third

world

countries

goverment

the organization that is the governing authority of a political unit

government

are

Suggestion

the source of corrupted individuals, (e

Accept space

indonesia

a republic in southeastern Asia on an archipelago including more than 13,000 islands; achieved independence from the Netherlands in 1945; the principal oil producer in the Far East and Pacific regions

Indonesia

, India

Accept space

etc

continuing in the same way

etc.

Its

Suggestion

It's

commonly caused by the lack of surveillance from the supervisor or the

govermental

relating to or dealing with the affairs or structure of government or politics or the state

governmental

tools who thinks that their salary are no longer sufficient to sustain their lifestyle.

Moreover

, many believed that

money

can buy joy.

Consequently

, Those who trust

Suggestion

this

notion

a politically organized body of people under a single government

nation

will spend their entire life chasing

money

, and at their pension age, they

finally

realize that their

hardwork

Suggestion

hard work

are

Suggestion

in vain, because they

can not

cannot

enjoy their own sweat. Unfortunately, Most of the regrets will come at the late moment. A study conducted by

world

suicide prevention cited that 60% of suicidal

case

a motor vehicle with four wheels; usually propelled by an internal combustion engine

cars

are involving

money

. By

this

statement alone we can conclude that

Money

wield power to determine a life of a human.

Therefore

, We must not depend for

money

exaggeratedly.

In addition

Money

as the perpetual machine of economy. The global economy of the

world

are based

Suggestion

is based

on it. Because it's versatility,

World

finance used it for every modern transaction that occur.

It's

Suggestion

Its

categorization

also

has diverse in its

belonging to or on behalf of a specified person (especially yourself); preceded by a possessive

own

way, From dollar to rupiahs

Accept space

from

Suggestion

From

giving wage to

Suggestion

employee to global trade connection,

it is

it's

all based on a single system,

Money

Therefore it

Accept comma addition

Therefore, it

is unquestionably the most vital equilibrium that we still count on from ancient

egypt

an ancient empire to the west of Israel; centered on the Nile River and ruled by a Pharaoh; figured in many events described in the Old Testament

Egypt

time till today. Without it, Humankind will suffer because the

world

economy will

blocked

Suggestion

block

by confusion from what currency that they should use. In conclusion,

Although

money influence

Accept comma addition

money, influence

the entire population of

human

Suggestion

humanity

, It

also

has several detrimental effects on human mental health. Despite

aforementioned statement

Suggestion

the aforementioned statement

, I should agree that

money

bring

Suggestion

brings

enormous role of human overall survival and happiness.

Sat Mar 14 2020

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

350 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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There are many things that motivate a person to work, but money is the most compelling. In your opinion, how influential is the power of money?

Fully explain your ideas

Children are now watching more television than they have ever done before. What are some of the negative effects of children watching a lot of television? Do you think young children should be allowed to watch television?

Homelessness is increasing in many major cities around the world. What do you think are the main causes of this problem and what measures could be taken to solve it?

In most countries, prison is an effective solution for the problem of crime. Some people think a more effective solution is to provide a better education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that school children should not be given homework by their teachers, whereas others argue that homework plays an important role in the education of children. Discuss both of these views and give your own opinion.