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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph shows the demand for energy and the energy available for fossil fuels in Freedonia from 1985 to 2005. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

The graph shows the demand for energy and the energy available for fossil fuels in Freedonia from 1985 to 2005. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.
The line graph indicates the relationship between
Use synonyms
demand
Correct article usage
the demand
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 for
energy
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 and the
energy
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 available from fossil fuels in Freedonia during the period between 1985 and 2005. It is apparent that there are 2 opposite trends shown on the graph from 1985 to 2005. The
demand
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 for
energy
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 dipped steadily between 1985 and 1990 from 5
units
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 of
energy
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 to approximately 2
units
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. From 1990 until about 1995,
energy
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demand
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 appeared to level off and remained constant at about 2
units
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 of
energy
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. From
this
Linking Words
 time onward,
energy
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demand
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 rocketed dramatically from 2
units
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 of
energy
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 in 1996 and is projected to reach 7
units
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 in the year 2005. In
constrast
Correct your spelling
contrast
, the
energy
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 available showed
the
Correct article usage
a
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 significant fluctuation in the period between 1985 and 2000. The amount of
energy
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 available from fossil fuels soared sharply from about 3.5
units
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 in 1985 until it reached a peak of 6.5 in 1995. From
this
Linking Words
 point onwards, it is projected to slip back spectacularly until it
keep
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keeps
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 steady at an availability level of around 2.5
units
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 from the year 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is noticeable that the
demand
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of
Change preposition
for
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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energy
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 exceeded its supply. In the future, Freedonians will have to enforce
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energy saving
Add a hyphen
energy-saving
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 measures or look towards the use of
alternatives
Change the noun form
alternative
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 sources of
energy
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.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 90%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words demand, energy, units with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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