Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones.Why is this case?Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Spending lots of
time
on screen has been seen among pupils these days and Use synonyms
this
happens because they find lots of entertainment in it as some parents work round the clock they do not have Linking Words
time
for their children so they give them gadgets so that they can focus on their work.Even though it seems an effective approach ,I still regard it as an unfortunate development.
Some individuals are convinced by Use synonyms
this
ideology because they think it provides educational value as children can learn faster from videos and it is a good way to entertain.Linking Words
Additionally
, smartphones can help develop technological skills, which are essential in today’s digital world.
Meanwhile,It is fairly easy to comprehend why I acknowledge Linking Words
this
trend as destructive simply because it affects a child’s physical and mental health. since when they spend hours on mobiles it affects their eyesight not only Linking Words
this
it Linking Words
also
affects their brain as spending all their Linking Words
time
on these technologies makes their brain work slowly and they lose their concentration and creativity. Use synonyms
For example
, A 10-year-old child spends several hours each day playing games and watching videos on their smartphone. Over Linking Words
time
, their school performance starts to decline because they are less focused on homework and studying. Use synonyms
Moreover
, children become lazy and unsocial as they stick to devices all day and do not perform any physical games.Linking Words
In addition
to Linking Words
this
, they do not get a chance to interact with their peers and friends and Linking Words
hence
lose social life.
Linking Words
To conclude
, Linking Words
while
Linking Words
according to
certain individuals using phones is a good way to get advanced knowledge ,I still believe it affects children’s growth in a negative way as they lose their goals and health.Linking Words
Submitted by nandnilekhi on
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Your essay presents clear and comprehensive ideas about why children spend time on smartphones and the implications of this habit.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which help frame your overall argument effectively.
task achievement
You address both parts of the question, discussing both why children spend time on smartphones and your perspective on whether it's a positive or negative development.
Fully explain your ideas
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
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