The two maps below show an island before and after the construction of some tourist facilities

#two #maps #show #island #construction #tourist #facilities

As moving between countries has become easier, the trend of

study

Wrong verb form

studying

show examples

or working abroad has

increase

Change the verb form

increased

show examples

in the

lately

Replace the word

later

show examples

years. Even though

this

promises a

numbers

Correct the article-noun agreement

number

show examples

of advantages,

people

also

have to face some other

disadvantage

Fix the agreement mistake

disadvantages

show examples

at the same

times

Fix the agreement mistake

time

show examples

. For the advantages, the financial potential should be the most important.

Generally

Add a comma

,Generally

show examples

people

choose to work

Change preposition

apply

show examples

anywhere that will pay them better, with

this

, they can support a whole family from their hometown.

Otherwise

people

tend to move from a developing country to a developed one for its

advance

Replace the word

advanced

show examples

improvements in all

aspect

Fix the agreement mistake

aspects

show examples

of life.

For example

, a family

immigrates

Wrong verb form

immigrating

show examples

to the US or EURO will have access to

Correct your spelling

its

show examples

health care system, their children can enjoy a free and comprehensive education, which is worth all their effort to

going

Change the form of the verb

show examples

to a whole new country.

However

, there should be some advantages

such

as unfamiliar environments.

For

example

Add a comma

,example

show examples

not anyone is accustomed to the modern metro and bus system,

Correct word choice

and it

show examples

will take them a lot of time to transport around without their personal vehicle like in their hometown. Language is

also

a great barrier, with a newly learned language

people

can never express their full idea which can

sometime

Replace the word

sometimes

show examples

cause many serious misunderstood.

Submitted by khamdamovazizbek777 on Thu Mar 26 2020

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, for example".

▼

Introduction: The introduction is missing.

▼

Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

▼

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

203 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

island
before and after
construction
tourist facilities
maps
changes
comparison
description
implications
personal opinion

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The two maps below show an island before and after the construction of some tourist facilities

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Some say that music is as important as other subjects in schools, especially at the preschool level. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion.

Some people believe that the experiences children have before they go to school will have the greatest effect on their future life. Others argue that experiences gained when they are teenagers have a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

With growing population in cities, more and more people live in a home with small or no outdoor areas. Is it a positive or negative development?

some educationist arguer that non-exam arts-based subject, such as music, drama, art, and craft, should be compulsory in the secondary curriculum. They believe that activities such as these can improve over all academic performance. To what extent do you agree or disagree?