Topic: There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

#topic #music #world #country

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Other than writing and painting,

music

Use synonyms

is another prevalent form of art, using the artistic rhythm of sounds.

Music

Use synonyms

is of great essence to us for various reasons, and I believe traditional

music

Use synonyms

is more important than

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

common international

music

Use synonyms

Music

Use synonyms

teaches us many things about life. As children, we live in the sweet lullabies about family that our mothers sing to us at night until we fall asleep. Later in life, we are able to understand more profoundly about love

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

passion and other virtues through many songs.

Music

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

for relaxation because we listen to

music

Use synonyms

when we are

stressful

Replace the word

stressed

show examples

or sad. Its soothing melodies can drive away all the pressure and frustration that we have to face every day.

And for

Correct word choice

For

show examples

many people,

music

Use synonyms

is a form of escapism from the suffocation of their lives since they can find serenity in

music

Use synonyms

. From my perspective, traditional

music

Use synonyms

should be more valued than international

music

Use synonyms

which has gained so much popularity all over the world. International

music

Use synonyms

is merely catchy and appealing, but its lyrics have no virtuous or meaningful messages. Especially

this

Linking Words

kind of

music

Use synonyms

has recently been used for commercial purposes to promote

reputation

Add an article

the reputation

show examples

of a business in the global market, so it has no

values

Fix the agreement mistake

value

show examples

at all. Traditional

music

Use synonyms

, on the other hand, conveys the culture and history of a country which will

last

Linking Words

for eternity. It not only connects the past to the present but

also

Linking Words

represents the identity of

people

Correct article usage

the people

show examples

who live in that country. In conclusion,

music

Use synonyms

is undoubtedly necessary for human beings, and I always believe that the role of traditional

music

Use synonyms

should be more recognized than that of international

music

Use synonyms

. (282 words)

Mon Mar 30 2020

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

284 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Write about the following topic: Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. • Write at least 250 words.
Lots of people believe that both genders have advantages and drawbacks, when it comes to careers, some professions should be only suitable for men or women. This solid thinking is considered a traditional value which develops many repercussions whilst some people continue to trust this belief that they think to be right.However, in our society now, some people believe that occupations should not base on their gender and that people have the right to achieve their dream professions. In this essay, the idea of whether careers should be limited by gender will be discussed and provide a personal view on this point of view.
5
band
Some people believe that advertisements aimed at children should be banned. Others argue that advertisements have a positive impact on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
There is an ongoing debate whether advertisements aimed at children need to be prohibited. While the opponents of this statement believe that commercials have a positive influence to children mindset, others argue that it is more beneficial for children to not exposured by them at all. I personally agree to the latter argument and I will elaborate more on this essay.
5.5
band
Some people believe that school students should be separated based on their abilities and talented, while others think that all students should study together. Discuss both views and express your opinion.
There is no denying the fact that Some people believe that school students should be separated based on their abilities and talents, while others think that all students should study together. while it is a commonly held belief that Some folks believe that school students should be separated based on their abilities, there are other people against this idea. There is an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that the person who presented this clue should be punished for it.
8
band
Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
There has been a contentious debate about whether university students should choose a subject based on their willingness or have a regulation to guide some students into the fields with socioeconomic advantages. I believe a balanced approach might be a better solution to answer individual interests while aligning with societal needs.
4.5
band
There is a problem with the changing rooms in the sports centre that you visit. You have complained several times but with no success. Write a letter to the manager of the sports centre. In your letter: •describe what the problem with the changing rooms is •say what happened the last times you complained •explain what you want the manager to do.
My name is Harjeet and I usually visit near sports center because I am a sports lover. I am writing this letter to express my dissatisfaction about the changing rooms in the sports club. Also, I already noted this problem to the team leader but he did not do anything about it.

Topic: There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people believe that advertisements aimed at children should be banned. Others argue that advertisements have a positive impact on children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that school students should be separated based on their abilities and talented, while others think that all students should study together. Discuss both views and express your opinion.

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.