Topic: There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Other than writing and painting,
music
is another prevalent form of art, using the artistic rhythm of sounds.
Music
is of great essence to us for various reasons, and I believe traditional
music
is more important than
the
Correct article usage
apply
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common international
music
.
Music
teaches us many things about life. As children, we live in the sweet lullabies about family that our mothers sing to us at night until we fall asleep. Later in life, we are able to understand more profoundly about love
and
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passion and other virtues through many songs.
Music
is
also
for relaxation because we listen to
music
when we are
stressful
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stressed
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or sad. Its soothing melodies can drive away all the pressure and frustration that we have to face every day.
And for
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For
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many people,
music
is a form of escapism from the suffocation of their lives since they can find serenity in
music
. From my perspective, traditional
music
should be more valued than international
music
which has gained so much popularity all over the world. International
music
is merely catchy and appealing, but its lyrics have no virtuous or meaningful messages. Especially
this
kind of
music
has recently been used for commercial purposes to promote
reputation
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the reputation
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of a business in the global market, so it has no
values
Fix the agreement mistake
value
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at all. Traditional
music
, on the other hand, conveys the culture and history of a country which will
last
for eternity. It not only connects the past to the present but
also
represents the identity of
people
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the people
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who live in that country. In conclusion,
music
is undoubtedly necessary for human beings, and I always believe that the role of traditional
music
should be more recognized than that of international
music
. (282 words)

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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