There is no need to go out to see live performance (concert...) because it is better to see them on the TV or Computer screen. Do you agree or disagree

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An emerging trend which has generated a widespread phenomenon in the entertainment field is watching home
movie
Fix the agreement mistake
movies
show examples
. I am inclined to believe that watching
movies
on screens is much better than coming to the social cinema. Not only will watching
movie
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movies
show examples
at home help us to save our precious time, but it can
also
be a private area to enjoy TV series. To look at the entertainment aspect, the most important factor to consider is the daily form of recreation. If a person has
his
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
or
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apply
show examples
her private applications or websites to relax against some pillows
while
watching the
movies
, it will be one of the best
option
Change to a plural noun
options
show examples
for them to save an amount of huge money
instead
of
uncomfortable
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being uncomfortable
show examples
going
direct
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directly
show examples
to the social cinema.
Such
a form of entertainment,
moreover
, will create a private place for us to watch wonderful
movies
without irritating
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others intensely. The more people are around, the more bad emotional feelings we will get. It is true that we always find confidence and truly
happy
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happiness
show examples
whenever we can gather with friends or family members, which can be destroyed
while
watching in the social cinema with strangers. In order to avoid
this
situation, all we need to do is self-quarantine, find a great
Tv
Correct your spelling
TV
show examples
show and relax. With that being said, everything always has its defective sides and it is pretty true on home-
movie
watching. What really makes
audience
Add an article
the audience
show examples
truly boring
about
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with
show examples
the film is
a
Correct article usage
the
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distraction. Assuming a person is watching his favourite
movie
, he might be momentarily distracted by social media platforms
such
as Facebook, Instagram or even the notification of messages which is pretty unpleasant. Watching
movies
in our private area can affect negatively
on
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apply
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our routine, we might
be
Verb problem
become
show examples
immersed in blockbuster
movies
or
Tv
Correct your spelling
TV
show examples
series and
be
Verb problem
become
show examples
lazy.
Moreover
, Blue light from computer screens will cause some contemporary symptoms
such
as eye strain,
blur
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blurred
show examples
vision or headache. In conclusion, watching
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
movie
Fix the agreement mistake
movies
show examples
is on the rise, and watching
movie
Fix the agreement mistake
movies
show examples
on
computer
Correct article usage
the computer
show examples
trend brings both advantages and disadvantages to
our self
Correct your spelling
ourselves
show examples
and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others. Moderation is the key to
remain
Verb problem
maintaining
show examples
the
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apply
show examples
balance and
solve
Wrong verb form
solving
show examples
these problems effectively.
Submitted by michaelangelos303 on

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Overall
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are clearly presented and directly relate to the topic. Develop and support main points with relevant details and examples. Make sure the logical structure of the essay is well-organized to effectively convey your ideas.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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