IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

some people think it is more important to spend money on roads and motorways than on public transport systems such as railways and trams. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #money #roads #motorways #transport #systems #railways #trams
Whether or not funding should be allocated to roads and motorised vehicle paths rather than spent on public
transport
 is a debatable topic.
This
 writer contends that investments in public transportation systems are much more necessary, for their cost-effectiveness and reduced cost of long-distance travel. It is crucial to understand that, a well-organised public
transport
 scheme is desired to help a lot of people commute in just one single trip.
Due to
 the fact that the public
transport
system
 can carry many more customers at a time, it is very economical as there is only a need for fewer vehicles to
transport
 a larger quantity of passengers.
Therefore
, the amount of money saved on developing vehicles can diverted for improvements of
transport
system
 infrastructure
such
 as roads.
For instance
, Japan has highly developed modes of public transportation
such
 as trains, they only need to use a small fraction of the economy to develop a reliable
system
. Despite these, many people still argue that public vehicles when carrying passengers over long distances will always charge exorbitant prices.
This
 viewpoint is totally falsehood, almost all
transport
 systems nowadays are funded by governments. Because of
this
 travelling long distances will only cost the customers the average price of a ticket. As an example,
Japanese
Correct article usage
the Japanese
show examples
governments
Fix the agreement mistake
government
show examples
 funded all of the nation's
transport
system
 making it cheaper for all citizens to use. In conclusion. investing ob public
transport
 systems would be more beneficial for long-distance travel.
Thus
, it should have been demonstrated that spending money on public
transport
 is a wise decision

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task achievement
While you have provided a clear stance and conclusion, try to elaborate more on your points. Add more supporting evidence and examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph logically flows to the next. While your essay is structured, the transition between ideas can be smoother. Use more transitional phrases such as 'Furthermore', 'In addition', or 'On the other hand'.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps maintain the reader's understanding.
task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt and provides a clear stance on the issue, which shows a good understanding of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • public transport systems
  • economic growth
  • traffic congestion
  • carbon emissions
  • social equity
  • urban development
  • sustainable
  • mobility needs
  • revitalization
  • efficiency
  • safety
  • reliance
  • combatting
  • mitigating
What to do next:
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