Children are less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore, sports lessons must be compulsory in schools. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#children #time #sports #lessons #schools

Nowadays minors are becoming less active than before at leisure

time

Therefore

, sports classes have to be obligatory

Suggestion

schools. Even though attaching more importance to sports facilities are fairly expensive for government,

sport

plays a significant role in people’s life. I will debate both sides of

argument

Suggestion

an argument

the argument

this

essay. On the one hand, providing with better sports facilities

are

Suggestion

luxurious for government. If sports lessons are mandatory for school children, more educator of physical activities who have to be supplied with salary might work at schools which means

extra expenditure

Suggestion

an extra expenditure

for

authority

. Another expenditure of government will be constructing some contemporary sports complexes

such

as gym, pitch, swimming pools, cycle track, et cetera.

Furthermore

, alternative solution in order to avoid being less active at spare

time

minors may travel to short distance,

for

instance they

Accept comma addition

instance, they

may visit their relative’s so as to assist housework.

However

, it will be more helpful to dedicate free

time

for educational activity, since sports are considered as a waste of valuable study

time

. In my view, children might prefer to learn poems by heart or to deal with a crossword puzzle rather than playing football or swimming.

On the other hand

sport

Suggestion

the sport

has a pivotal role in people’s life so as to build

healthy lifestyle

Suggestion

a healthy lifestyle

healthy lifestyles

. In fact, children’s health depends on their physical activities which are done at leisure or study

time

. Having and maintaining

healthy way

Suggestion

a healthy way

of life

are

Suggestion

beneficial for both minors and

authority

. Because, if people are healthier

adequately

Suggestion

adequate

authority

Suggestion

the authority

must not spend much money on medical care for

population

Suggestion

the population

a population

populations

Moreover

sport

is another factor for minors to be well-being. In my opinion, many school children suffer

from sitting one

Suggestion

from sitting in one

place without

movement

Suggestion

moving

during classes that may affect their mental development as well.

Thus physical

Accept comma addition

Thus, physical

lessons may be enforced in order to cause children’s mental well-being.

Additionally

Accept comma addition

Additionally, sport

sport

gives an opportunity for school children so as to learn how to follow discipline and work with others as a team.

Therefore

, it will rational to conclude that sports lessons should be strengthened in order to make minors

more physical

Suggestion

more physically

active

now albeit

Accept comma addition

now, albeit

some expenditure which may be spent by

authority

Suggestion

the authority

. Because

sport

is regarded as a significant activity so as to have

healthy and satisfied lifestyle

Suggestion

a healthy and satisfied lifestyle

Submitted by sherzod.sanatov on Sun Apr 05 2020

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

375 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Children are less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore, sports lessons must be compulsory in schools. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this

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Today, many people don't know their neighbours in large city What problems does this cause what can be done about this

Traditions are about the past and innovation is about the future, and it has been argued that we need to let go of traditions for the sake of progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this? What role should traditions have in our lives?