Tourism is becoming increasingly important as a source of revenue to many countries, but its disadvantages should not be overlooked. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#tourism #source #revenue #countries

These days It is an undeniable fact that tourist spots in every country have become more popular and have so many visitors. All over the world, nations are trying to showcase their respective countries to attract visitors because of the belief that with more tourist, more money will come in. I completely agree that the disadvantages of the international movement should be handled prudently to lessen its adverse effects on a nation. In

this

essay I will support my opinion on the drawbacks of vacation industry by relevant examples

Firstly

, travel activities can threaten the traditional culture of a kingdom. Local people tend to imitate the cultures that are brought by the tourists from their home countries. Based on a cultural research conducted in Indonesia

last

year, local people stated that their traditional cultures are not suitable to the modern era, whereas the cultures brought by tourists to their state are more suitable and modern.

For example

, more local people like wearing modern clothes rather than traditional one as well as they follow more modern dances than the traditional one. Another Reason why I agree is leisure industry can cause the bad effect to the environment. Pollution threatens a certain place because of the growing number of people and establishments.

For instance

, garbage disposal may become a problem due to the increase volume of wastes and of people who fail to properly dispose their wastes. Take Bali as an example

besides

getting awards because of the successful Holiday, business,

this

city is well-known for the rubbish as well.

Then

, the local people get the effect to their environment,

such

as land pollution, flood, and air pollution because of the waste. In conclusion, a flourishing travel has its economic advantages for the republic and its citizens. Its ill effects,

however

, can lead to the destruction of the environment that was once a beautiful and profit-generating attraction.

Submitted by chandu5385 on Sun Apr 12 2020

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

315 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Tourism is becoming increasingly important as a source of revenue to many countries, but its disadvantages should not be overlooked. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

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The state of environment is now a cause for concern in all countries across the world. Apart from government measures & policies, what can individuals do on a personal level to combat the negative effects that our lifestyles have on the environment?

Addition to the internet is a wide spread problem. What problems does it cause? What is a suitable solution?

Some people advocate death penalty for those who committed violent crimes. Others say that capital punishment is unacceptable in contemporary society. Describe advantages and disadvantages of death penalty and give your opinion.