MamadjonovSamandar: The graph below shows four countries of residence pf overseas students in Australia. Summarize the information ba selecting and reporting the main features, and make make comparisons where relevant

MamadjonovSamandar:

The graph below shows four countries of residence pf overseas students in Australia. 

Summarize the information ba selecting and reporting the main features, and make make comparisons where relevant
The line graph provided demonstrates what the number of international students from
such
4 chosen countries as
Indonesia
,
Hong
Kong
,
Malaysia
and
Singapore
was like in Australia over 18 years starting from 1982.Units are measured in 1000 students
Overall
, it can be seen from
figure
Add an article
the figure
show examples
that, the number of students
came
Correct pronoun usage
who came
show examples
from 4 countries increased gradually between
giving
Correct article usage
the giving
show examples
period, but
Indonesia
reached the pick after
Singapore
in 2000
although
Malaysia
demonstrated the highest rate at the beginning
while
the number of people from
Hong
Kong
and
Malaysia
was almost the same at that time. One of the first things to note is that
Malaysia
had rather more
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
showing approximately 7 compared to
Indonesia
and
Hong
Kong
demonstrating almost 1.
Following
this
,
Malaysia
leveled
Change the spelling
levelled
show examples
out
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
decade demonstrating 9
while
Indonesia
,
Singapore
and
Hong
Kong
increased steadily in
this
period showing almost 10 in 1994.
Finally
Add a comma
,Finally
show examples
Indonesia
,
Hong
Kong
,
Malaysia
,
Singapore
Correct word choice
and Singapore
show examples
fluctuated
next
6 years and showed 21, 18 19,
17
Correct word choice
and 17
show examples
appropriated in 2000.
Submitted by azizamamajonova98 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "next, while".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words indonesia, hong, kong, malaysia, singapore with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!