MamadjonovSamandar: The graph below shows four countries of residence pf overseas students in Australia. Summarize the information ba selecting and reporting the main features, and make make comparisons where relevant

#mamadjonovsamandar #four #countries #residence #pf #students #australia #information #ba #features #comparisons

The line graph provided demonstrates what the number of international students from

such

4 chosen countries as

Indonesia

Hong

Kong

Malaysia

and

Singapore

was like in Australia over 18 years starting from 1982.Units are measured in 1000 students

Overall

, it can be seen from

figure

Add an article

the figure

show examples

that, the number of students

came

Correct pronoun usage

who came

show examples

from 4 countries increased gradually between

giving

Correct article usage

the giving

show examples

period, but

Indonesia

reached the pick after

Singapore

in 2000

although

Malaysia

demonstrated the highest rate at the beginning

while

the number of people from

Hong

Kong

and

Malaysia

was almost the same at that time. One of the first things to note is that

Malaysia

had rather more

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

showing approximately 7 compared to

Indonesia

and

Hong

Kong

demonstrating almost 1.

Following

this

Malaysia

leveled

Change the spelling

levelled

show examples

out

Correct article usage

the next

show examples

decade demonstrating 9

while

Indonesia

Singapore

and

Hong

Kong

increased steadily in

this

period showing almost 10 in 1994.

Finally

Add a comma

,Finally

show examples

Indonesia

Hong

Kong

Malaysia

Singapore

Correct word choice

and Singapore

show examples

fluctuated

6 years and showed 21, 18 19,

Correct word choice

and 17

show examples

appropriated in 2000.

Submitted by azizamamajonova98 on Sun Apr 12 2020

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "next, while".

▼

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words indonesia, hong, kong, malaysia, singapore with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.

▼

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

162 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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